


Burning Desire

by spobylol



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: Cheating, Drunk Sex, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-04
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2018-04-29 20:10:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 41,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5140985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spobylol/pseuds/spobylol
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After getting into a fight with her boyfriend, Aria runs into a familiar face at the local bar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is time-jumpy.. it takes place a few years after high school.

_"I'm not in the mood tonight, honey."_

_Aria raises an eyebrow, giving him a look of disbelief. He's rejected her advances every night this week, and it's getting tiring for her. She rolls over away from him, turning the other direction. He senses she's a bit pissed now, and puts his hand on her arm._

_"Aria, are you joking right now?" he asks. "You're mad at me?"_

_"Did I say I'm mad at you?" she challenges. "All I did was turn the other direction. I'm more comfortable this way."_

_"I know you. I know you do this when you're mad," he says, sighing. "I had a long, tiring day at work, and I just don't feel like doing anything tonight. Is that so hard to understand? God, why can't you ever understand that my work is stressful?"_

_She rolls her eyes._

_"As if my job isn't stressful?" she says. "Well, it is. It's just as stressful as yours, but you don't see me bitching about it like you are. I make time for us. I had a lot to do at work today, and I still came home and wanted to spend time with you. But it's the same story every night. 'Oh, I don't feel like it tonight because I had crap to deal with at work'. We all have crap to deal with! But that doesn't mean we get to ignore each other."_

_"Ignoring each other? I didn't ignore you!" he almost yells. "Sometimes people aren't in the mood for sex. Why are you being a bitch about that?"_

_She grits her teeth. 'Bitch'. He's never called her that before in his life. He's never been the guy to say that._

_"Because this 'bitch' doesn't just go and have a lame-ass job as a teacher, and then complain about late night faculty meetings and grading crappy high school English essays. My job is a little more complex than that, but I'm still coming home every night with a smile on my face, ready to spend time with you. Would it kill you to do the same?" she scoffs._

_"I can't believe you're turning me not wanting to have sex into this bullshit about my job!" he snaps. "And thank you for telling me my job is a piece of cake. It really shows how you believe in me. Now I've been reminded about how my girlfriend works at a successful editing company, and I'm the low-life piece of shit that is nothing more than a teacher. Thank you. You're the greatest girlfriend I could ever ask for."_

_The venom from his words stings her, and she feels aching in her body. She feels terrible. But not because she regrets what she said, although she didn't mean to offend him with the teacher comment. 'You're the greatest girlfriend I could ever ask for'. It's horrible the way the sarcasm makes it sting so horribly. She overanalyzes_ _ — he's saying she's not the greatest girlfriend, and that's something a girlfriend never wants to hear. _

_ She gets out of bed, slipping her shoes in. _

_ "Aria!" he calls after her. "Where are you going?" _

_ "As the terrible girlfriend I am, Ezra, I don't have to tell you shit about what I'm doing." _

And that's how she ended up here, sitting at the bar, a few drinks too many in. Even the bartender is shocked about how much she's drinking, and he sees a lot of crazy people on a daily basis drinking more than is proper, so that says something about how much she's drinking. She slams another glass down on the bar's countertop, looking around the room. All the empty seats are near her, but if she looks a distance away, there are people full of life, socializing and flirting. 

She hasn't done this since she got back together with Ezra. She used to come to the bar and meet guys after she turned 21. She and Ezra weren't together for quite some time after high school and well into college, so she met a lot of different guys, and had a lot more one-night-stands than she ever thought she would. But she got back together with Ezra, and that all ended.

So, they got in a fight earlier that day, and now she's back at the bar. Technically, they didn't break up yet. And they live together, so it's not like she can just run away from him and never come back. All her shit is in their damn place.

"No fucking way," a deep voice says from behind her. She turns around, surprised by the familiarity of his voice, and smiles when she recognizes the somewhat blurry figure of the blonde male. "Aria Montgomery, I haven't seen you in.. damn, I don't even know how long. Since you went to college?"

"Maybe, I.. don't knooow," she slurs, leaning back against the bar countertop. "Jaasooon! When did you get back to Rosewood?"

"I came back recently. I had fun living it up in California, but it was time to come home. And as much as I think Rosewood can be a piece of shit, it's still my home," he explains. "But shit, Aria, you're wasted as hell. What the hell?"

"I'm not!" Aria exclaims, trying to regain herself. She's had a lot of alcohol, but she can still somewhat think. "And, you're single?"

He laughs, raising his eyebrows.

"I am, but I don't think that's supposed to matter to you. Spencer still talks to me sometimes. She said you're back together with  _him_ again. It must be pretty serious if you keep going back to him every time you break up," Jason says, biting his lip.

He takes a seat next to her.

"We got back together, but he's being a dick right now, and I don't want to deal with a dick. So, you better promise me you're not going to be a dick, or else _—_ " she rambles.

"Okay, okay," he chuckles. "I won't be a dick, I swear."

"He was annoying me, so now I'm here. Is that so crazy?" she asks.

"No, I guess not. I hope you're not going to make a stupid decision that you'll regret in the morning with one of these sleazy bar guys," Jason laughs. "That's hypocritical, considering I'm one of those sleazy bar guys, since I'm here, after all."

Aria tilts her head to the side, scanning his face. He's handsome, even when he's drunk. She doesn't know why, but being drunk makes her overly think about all those years ago when Jason kissed her. She remembers the taste of his lips against hers. His minty, fresh breath and soft lips. He's a good kisser _—_ it's no surprise a lot of girls are into him. He's probably here, at this bar, to pick up another girl that'll be lucky enough to feel his perfect kisses tonight.

She doesn't know why she tries to flirt with him, but she does. She's mad at Ezra, and she wants him to suffer. Just for now, though. She knows she'll make up with him soon enough, and she'll regret feeling any bad feelings towards him. It happens every damn time.

"I'm here to make stupid decisions," Aria tells him. "The stupidest of stupid decisions ever. Sooo, do you wanna be my sleazy bar guy for tonight or what?"

Jason raises his eyebrows.

"Aria _—_ "

"What? Don't tell me you don't want this," she laughs, rolling her eyes. "You used to stare at me all the time. You told me you have feelings for me. Alison used to tell me how you had the biggest crush on me, so don't act like it's so crazy, Jas."

Jason sighs.

"That was then. This is now. We're adults. You are, too. That was me being a horny college boy that would have gotten with any of Alison's hot friends. Dammit, that's not true. I did like you, I'll admit that. But it's different now," he says.

"Different how?" Aria asks. "You don't think it would feel good?"

Jason raises his eyebrows again.

"Feel good?" he asks. "What?"

"You  _know_ what. Don't play dumb with me," she bats her eyelashes. "The sex, genius. You don't think it would feel good."

"Of course I think it would. Are you crazy? I've thought about it so many times when I was younger, but the timing isn't right. You're fighting with your boyfriend, and we haven't seen each other in forever _—_ " Jason begins.

"I want this," Aria confesses, moving her chair closer to his. "I always wondered what having sex with you would feel like. I mean, look at you. The sex must be good if it's with you, right? I just want to feel good. This isn't about feelings, and this isn't about my boyfriend. I mean, hell, I'm gonna break up with him tomorrow. We're done."

Jason feels a spark of hope. She wants to break up with her boyfriend, even if she's saying it just because she's drunk. Aren't drunk words supposed to speak for sober thoughts? Something like that...

"I could make you feel good," Jason whispers, leaning closer to her lips. "I could make you scream my name so loud that you'd fucking forget all about your boyfriend. I could be inside of you, and put my lips on every inch of your skin. You'd be moaning senseless. I could brush my tongue inside of you. I could give you the best fucking sex of your life."

Aria's almost out of breath at his words. Their faces are so close, and she wants to kiss him. Or maybe it's the alcohol inside of her, but she fucking wants this so badly. She wants to take him right there, as if nobody is watching.

He smirks at her, and leans back.

"Yeah, but that's not gonna happen tonight."

Aria raises her eyebrows in absolute disbelief.

"You tease," she mutters, shaking her head. "I hate you."

"Oh, really? You hate me?" he smirks. He reaches his hand under her skirt, pushing her panties slightly away. He pushes a finger inside her clit, licking his lips. She leans back, releasing a moan from her mouth. But before it goes anywhere, he takes his fingers out, still smirking at her. "For somebody who hates me, you sure are turned on right now. I bet you thought I was about to finger you right here, didn't you?" 

"Why the hell are you doing this?" she asks.

"For starters, you're trying to seduce me and hook up with me while you have a boyfriend," he rolls his eyes. "Oh, and not to mention, you made me act like a fool back when I liked you. You made me think I had a shot, but then just ran away with Ezra. I'm not letting you do this to me again. So, think of it as payback for all those years ago. I came here to have a friendly conversation with you, but I guess that's not what you're looking for, so I'll be on my way. Good night, Aria."

He gets up from his seat, and licks her wetness off his fingers right in front of her face, only arousing her more. Dammit, Jason. He turns around and winks at her as he walks away, and goes off to some hot blonde girl that he'll be taking home tonight. 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason tries to pursue Aria, but she's determined to fix things with Ezra and resolve their issues.

"I'm sorry— sorry for all the crap I said today and I really need you to be here and I also don't know what I'm saying anymore," Aria rambles into the phone. "Can you pleeease come get me? I still have the common sense not to drive—"

"Are you  _drunk_?" Ezra demands through the phone. "Aria, this is so irresponsible and stupid! Do you have any idea what time it is right now?" He sighs. "Dammit, Aria... you never should have left the house. I can't believe you went out to drink after we had a fight. This sounds like what a guy would do. I don't even know why I'm saying any of this because you probably aren't listening very well right now. But please, where are you?"

"Pennsylvania," she responds, and hangs up the phone, falling back against the chair.

She isn't thinking clearly, so she doesn't know why she hangs up on him. But Jason notices her from the corner of the bar. He looks up at her, excusing himself and abandoning the hot blonde he's talking to, and instead goes to speak to Aria.

"Oh, did you change your mind about that whole sex thing?" Aria jokes. "Because it's too late. That door has closed, sir."

He raises his eyebrows and folds his arms.

"Nah, I haven't changed my mind, even if the offer was still on the table. But I did realize your wasted ass is gonna need a ride home, so.. do you need one or not?" Jason asks. "I'd give you cash for a cab, but I don't think you're capable of getting home alone in a cab with this much shit in your system."

She shakes her head and mimics him by folding her arms as well.

"I don't need you. Ezra loves me and he's coming to pick me up," Aria tells him.

"Isn't that lovely?" he rolls his eyes. "And you told him where you are?"

"Yes, in Pennsylvania!" she exclaims.

He rolls his eyes again.

"Give me your phone," he demands, but doesn't even wait for her to respond. He just grabs her phone and calls Ezra.

"Hey, you thief!" Aria yells. "Everyone, we have a  _phone thief_!" 

To no success, she tries to grab the phone from Jason's hands, although he is much too tall for her short self to reach. Luckily, Ezra picks up the phone.

"Hey, man. It's Jason DiLaurentis. Your girlfriend is wasted as hell, and I found her in this bar, so I thought I'd save you the trouble of having to look all over town for her. She's in the Waterby Pub. Don't take too long. She might do something stupid," Jason informs him, and then hangs up the phone without waiting for his response. He hands the phone back to Aria.

"It's very rude to steal somebody's phone!" Aria cries.

"You'll thank me tomorrow when you realize I helped your drunk ass get home," Jason grins. "Since you won't be needing my help anymore, I'm gonna go get myself some hot sex with that blonde over there. She's been waiting for me for too long."

Aria raises her eyebrows, making an offended face. He gives her a curious look back, before he can even begin to walk away.

"You'll have sex with some mystery blonde, but not me?" Aria asks. "Jas, am I  _that_ horrible? Tell me, please. Ezra doesn't even wanna do anything with me. Tell me what's wrong with me! Am I too ugly, or do I look like I suck in bed—"

Jason shakes his head.

"Princess, I'm not screwing you tonight because you're drunk, and because you have a boyfriend. Trust me, if you were sober right now and the circumstances were different, I'd be all over you," Jason confesses, only because he knows she won't remember any of this tomorrow. "But Ezra's your boyfriend. If he doesn't screw you while he's lucky enough to have you, he's a complete idiot. He should cherish every moment he has with that perfect body. It's on a perfect person, after all."

Aria doesn't know what he's saying, though. She's half falling asleep, and almost falls over. Jason catches her, seating her back down on the bar stool.

"Don't be so clumsy," he tells her. "Maybe I'll wait with you until Ezra gets here." 

He glances back over at the blonde waiting for him. She's getting impatient. He knows that if he waits with Aria, the girl he's talking to is going to get jealous, impatient, and pissy, so he'll lose his opportunity to have sex tonight. But he doesn't want to leave a much too drunk Aria here alone tonight. It sucks, but he might just have to sacrifice sex with a hot woman to make sure Aria gets home safely. He wonders when he turned into such a softie.

In a few minutes, a stressed Ezra Fitz enters the bar. His expression is so worried, Jason almost laughs when he sees the curly haired man. He grabs Aria's arm immediately. He is  _not_ pleased with her. Jason can tell the conversations tomorrow between them are not going to be good.

"Bye, Jason!" Aria exclaims, waving at him.

Ezra sighs.

"Thanks for keeping her here, Jason. Sorry she had to burden you like this," Ezra says.

"Trust me, it was no problem at all," the blonde male says with a grin on his face.

Once Aria and Ezra are out of sight, he goes back to the hot girl he was just talking to. She's annoyed now.

"That other girl is more important to you than me?" the girl asks.

"She's an old family friend, and she's drunk. I had to make sure she gets home safe. You have nothing to worry about. That dude that came here was her boyfriend, anyway," Jason explains.

"The mood's been killed," the girl tells him.

So, Jason doesn't get sex that night. The girl leaves him, but he isn't that sad about it. After what happened with Aria, he's sure he would have just been thinking about her while screwing the other girl. He imagines what would have happened if he was the kind of douchebag that would screw a drunk girl. Maybe he'd screw a drunk girl. Just not a drunk Aria. A drunk stranger, maybe. But Aria's different. He wouldn't do that to her.

But what would have happened if he did? Would he be in bed with her right now? Would he be running kisses down her neck, all the way south of the equator? Would he have been pushing inside of her right now, hearing her moans and her screams? The way her fingernails would scratch down his back? It would have been some hot drunk sex, he knows that. He knows it. And he regrets not taking up her offer in some ways. 

He almost had her once, back when they were younger and had that fling going on. But, because of Ezra, it ended. He never got the opportunity to go any further with her than a brief kiss. He could have went much further than that tonight, but he didn't. 

* * *

_Jason stands in front of the bed while she's laying back on the pillow. He's shirtless with toned abs being flaunted immensely in the dim lighting of her bedroom. He approaches the bed, getting closer and closer by the second. Then, he stops. He stops and undoes his belt, letting it fall to the floor. Her eyes watch every movement closely, getting excited by the thought of him undressing. His cargo pants soon fall to the floor as well._

_"Ezra's going to be home from work soon," Aria whispers, as if Ezra is going to hear her somehow._

_He toys with the hem of his boxer shorts._

_"I can make it quick," Jason whispers back in that low, sexy voice of his. "I'll have you screaming in a fucking minute. Maybe less than that."_

_Aria releases a heavy breath. Her eyes can't leave. They're scanning his body, starting from his perfect face going down. She admires his abs. And she admires the fact that she's finally going to be able to see what massive thing he's been hiding under those boxers all these years. She had a fling with him in high school, sure, but she never got to see his package since they'd never gone as far as having sex. She had a dream about him back then—a sex dream. Back then, that was something she thought only guys had._

_He's about to drop his boxers. She's about to see it for the first time, and she feels like a little girl who has never seen a penis in her entire life because she's so intrigued by what it'll look like. How great can he be, anyway?_

Her eyes burst open. Did she just have a dream about Jason DiLaurentis? Her head aches like never before, and she's sure she's hungover. She knows she went to the bar last night to drink, but what happened there is a complete blur. She gets the feeling that she and Jason interacted last night. Why else would she think about somebody she hasn't thought about in years?

When she rolls to the side, there's a note on the nightstand. It's from Ezra.

_I had to get to work. We can talk about last night when I get home.  
-Ezra_

She rolls her eyes. She's  _totally_ looking forward to arguing and discussing all her relationship problems tonight! She's still concerned about why she had a fucking sex dream about somebody who isn't her boyfriend. Not only that, but somebody she hasn't spoken to in years! She's certain that she must have interacted with Jason at the bar. It makes sense. Jason used to drink all the time.

She's too lazy to get up and eat. She's honestly feeling queasy and not too hungry, anyway. She stays in bed, and grabs her phone from the nightstand as well. When she checks her Instagram, she begins scrolling through the posts. Until she reaches Ezra's. His 'faculty meeting'. He posted a photo from his faculty meeting?

They're at somebody's house, and he's got his arm around a brunette woman. She  _knows_ that woman. It's Ms. Steele from Rosewood High School. She's an AP history teacher, and she's always around Ezra. That's the woman that she always jealousy makes passes at when she talks to Ezra. He always tells her she's overreacting, and Ms. Steele is just a co-worker of his. A very, very attractive co-worker at that, Aria thinks. Of course she knows Ezra would never even think about cheating on her, but she doesn't trust that woman. She hates how happy they look together in the photo, and were definitely discussing more than just crappy Rosewood High School problems all night. They couldn't possibly have been talking about work for hours like that. She can imagine them slipping into a different conversation where they talk about their love lives, and Ezra will confide in her and tell her about how he's been fighting with his girlfriend lately. She, being so slick, would tell him he deserves better. She shudders at the thought, even though it's just her worst-case-scenario imagination running wild. She knows she really has no clue what happened last night, and maybe that's the part that scares her the most— that she  _doesn't_ know what happened.

She decides to put her phone away so she'll stop thinking about Ms. Steele and Ezra together, and goes downstairs to fix herself breakfast. After she puts two peaces of bread in the toaster, there's an irritating knock on the door. She groans quietly, and opens the door.

"Hey," the sexy voice says. "I thought I'd drop by and say hello now that you're sober again. I'm sure you don't remember much of our conversation last night."

"Jason..." Aria mutters. "I had a feeling we talked last night. So, you're back in Rosewood?"

"That I am," he responds, nodding his head. "Do you have some time to talk, or are you talking through your relationship issues with the boyfriend?"

"How do you—" she begins.

"You sorta confided in me last night," he laughs. "Don't worry, I won't tell him what happened."

Aria's stomach churns.  _What happened_? What the hell happened between them last night?

"What do you mean?" she asks. "Jason, did something happen between us?"

"Depends on what your definition of 'something' is. I mean, being the gentleman I am, I didn't take advantage of you when you threw yourself at me for drunk sex," he chuckles. "But maybe I'm regretting that decision, because damn, Aria, after all this time, you still look great."

Heat rises to her cheeks.

" _Well_ , maybe you should have taken your opportunity last night, because it's never going to happen again. I love Ezra," she tells him.

"Do you now?" Jason asks.

"Yes, of course!" Aria cries. "This is not how I'm supposed to be greeting you. You're Spencer and Alison's sibling, and I respect you. We're supposed to be friends, and now I feel like we're going back to that awkward time when there was this.. thing between us."

"Yeah, it wasn't much of a thing. More like I actually liked you, we kissed, and then you went right back to your pretty boyfriend. Looks like you're still with him, so it must be important. I have a feeling you're gonna lead me on again, but then jump right back to him the second time. What do you say we parallel what we had before?" he smirks.

"You're insane to think I'm going to do anything with you. I'm sober now, I have a conscience. I'd never hurt him," she says.

"Fair enough, but I believe wise scholars have said drunk actions speak sober thoughts," Jason grins.

She has to admit, he also looks amazing after all these years. He's got stubble now, making him look manlier and it suits him quite well. She licks her lips at the thought of feeling his stubble against her face. That erotic dream she had, dammit... How could she dream about him after  _one_ drunk exchange they had?

"How are you holding up?" Jason asks. "You were pretty drunk last night. Headache?"

"Yeah, a little," she responds.

"Here," he says, handing her a pill bottle. "I brought you some aspirin. I trust that you won't OD or something. Don't have as many pills as you had drinks. One or two should do the trick," he jokes.

"What do you want from me, Jason?" Aria asks.

"So, I guess you're not happy to see me after all this time. Disappointing," he shrugs. "I thought we'd have this miraculous reunion where you suddenly realize that I'm the one, but I guess that isn't happening. Damn. You clearly want me to leave, so I'll go." He raises his eyebrows. "It sucks to think we could have finished what we started last night. I'm pretty sure you were into it, considering how fucking wet you were, you know."

" _Jason_ ," she says in a stern voice. "Before you go, you better tell me what the hell happened between us last night."

"Relax. Aside from telling me you wanna have sex, nothing. We didn't do anything, thanks to me stopping it, so a thank-you would be nice," he tells her.

"Oh, yes. Thank you so much for not being a slut and screwing me when I was drunk. You're the truest form of a gentleman," Aria sarcastically says. She then realizes that he made that comment about her being wet. As awkward as it is, she gains the courage and asks, "If we um.. if we didn't do anything, how did you know.. you know?"

"How did I know how wet you were for me?" he grins, leaning closer, but not too close. "I slid my hand up that sexy skirt of yours. Just to check. Damn, when my fingers went under your panties, you were soaked—"

"Okay, I've had enough," she stops him. "I'm sorry if I was misleading last night, but this isn't what I want. I didn't mean any of that, okay? I do love Ezra."

"Alright," he says, shrugging his shoulders. "If that's what you want, then I'll back off. It sucks, we'll never get to find out how fucking good we could please each other. It has to get a little boring with the teacher man, doesn't it? I'm gonna be sticking around in town, so if you're having second thoughts about not getting your chance with me, then come over any time. I could fuck you better than him, you know."

"And how would you know you're that good?" Aria asks, intrigued.

"Trust me, I am," he laughs. "I've got enough evidence, but you would have to be there all those times to know how it was. But, you can get firsthand evidence and come get some yourself. Imagine it, though. I could be on top of you, ripping off every last damn piece of clothing you're wearing. My tongue could move down every fucking inch of your body. I'd clean that wetness right out of you." He smirks at her, knowing he's already mentally seduced her. "But, it's your choice. You can choose to let yourself believe that whatever sex you're having with Fitzy is satisfying. It's never a bad thing to widen your horizons and learn what it's like for somebody who actually knows how to please you to.. please you."

She rolls her eyes.

"Goodbye, Jason. Lucky you, I won't tell Spencer and Ali that you said this crap to me," she jokes, and closes the door.

But she's trying to stop her heart from beating so quickly, even though he's gone. Dammit, she  _is_ thinking about sex with him, even though she doesn't want to. Ezra's  _not_ bad in bed. Of course, he doesn't really want to make time to do things with her anymore, so she's almost forgotten what it feels like. But she knows it's good. They make love to each other, they don't just fuck around. Jason just wants to fuck her, and she knows she'll regret it if she does it. She has Ezra, a man that loves her unconditionally. She's not going to trade that up for sex-addict Jason that's probably said the same line to a thousand other girls.

He does put up a really good front about how amazing he is at sex, though. She feels like it's necessary to know if he is that good. She shakes off the thought, and goes back to making her toast.

* * *

 

"Ar, I'm home," Ezra announces when he makes his way inside. "Are you ready to talk about the bar thing?"

Aria comes down the stairs in the sexiest dress in her closet, and throws her arms around her boyfriend. She moves one hand over to his chest, tugging at the tie seductively. His facial expression changes completely. He doesn't look so serious anymore.

"Hey, honey," she flirtatiously says. "I know you wanted to do a lot of talking, but I think we can do other things instead. Other things that require almost no talking at all... maybe a few screams here and there."

He raises his eyebrows at her way of putting it, but doesn't fight it when she goes on her tip toes and kisses him passionately. Her arms loop back around his neck. He puts his hands on her waist, pulling her closer, almost forgetting about how pissed he's supposed to be about her bar charade.

"Aria, we're supposed to talk about what happened—" he begins.

"No, no more talking. We're always talking and fighting. I'm sick of it!" she cries. "Let's be us again, Ez. Let's have fun again. I miss the way we used to be. So passionate, so real. Show me what we were like again, please. I need you."

He doesn't want to fight her any longer. He kisses her again.

"No more talking," he agrees, and they end up in their bedroom.

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a disappointing reconciliation with Ezra, Aria turns to Jason for drunken company.

Aria feels foreign when she's laying in bed with a very naked Ezra. It's been a while since they've done this— a while much longer than she'd like to admit. That kind of lack of sex is not supposed to be there in an adult relationship. But she feels foreign and at home all at the same time. Her head is against Ezra's chest, and his hands hold her back, tracing circles with his fingers. They just lay there. Aria doesn't know if it's supposed to be romantic or something, but she sure as hell isn't completely satisfied with the sex they had.

She needs him to keep going. She needs to be pleased more. For some reason, she just wasn't able to orgasm. She's never had this issue before, and she's certainly surprised she's having it with her actual boyfriend. She could have forced him to keep going, but he'd already come much earlier than she had, and she knew if she didn't fake it, it was going to get weird between them. He'd be upset that he couldn't get her to finish.

"That was amazing," he comments happily, kissing the top of her head lovingly. "I'm sorry I've been so distant from you. I love you so much, Aria. I never want there to be that kind of distance between us again. I love being with you."

"Yeah," she agrees, putting her hand on the back of his neck, and pulling him in for a peck on the lips. "I love you, too."

"Let's not do this fighting thing ever again. I hate it. I hate being apart from you," he tells her, and is about to kiss her again, but before their lips can touch, they are cut off by the sound of Ezra's phone buzzing loudly. "I'm sorry, sweetheart," he apologizes and grabs his phone from the nightstand. "Shit..." he mumbles.

"Babe?" she asks. "What's wrong?"

"Work  _would_ bother me at this time," he says with a groan. "Ar, you know I want to be here, but there's a board meeting for the new common curriculum standards for next year, and I can't miss it. They preponed the meeting because the principal had a last minute thing come up. Catherine just texted me, and I have to get there now—"

"Catherine?" Aria questions.

"Yes," he answers. "My colleague: Ms. Steele. And please don't start with me. I know what you think about her, and what you think our relationship is, but it's professional. She respects me, and I respect her. And I love  _you_."

"Good thing for you to say, but what makes you think I was going to question Ms. Steele, anyway?" Aria asks.

"Because I know you, and you're probably looking to pick a fight to kill the magic we just had," he grins, and pecks her lips quickly. "And I know you've never trusted Catherine, but she's a good woman. She's pure. She'd never think of being that kind of woman, trust me. You just have to trust me, even if you don't trust her."

He gets up from bed, and puts his white button-up back on. She shuts her eyes for a moment, trying not to groan. She opens her eyes and sees him pulling his pants up. Then, he adjusts his tie, making himself look as formal as possible.

"Do you  _have_ to go?" Aria asks. "We were finally getting somewhere."

"Oh, I think we already reached our destination," he jokes with a wink. "But yeah, I do have to go. I can't miss this meeting, it's super important to the curriculum. Don't worry, though. When I get back from the meeting, we can pick up where we left off. Love you, honey. A lot. I love you a lot. I just want to say it to make up for the lost time."

"Bye," she sighs. "Have a good time at the meeting. But not too much of a good time."

"Without you? I wouldn't dare," he jokes, and pecks her lips again. "I'll call you before I leave. You can put on something sexy again." He chuckles and leaves the room, and soon the house.

She feels almost sick knowing that the sex felt like  _that_. They've always had grand reunions after their fights, resulting in sex good enough to make her forget about their fight. Once he's gone, she slips her panties and one of his shirts on, goes to the bathroom and splashes cold water on her face. She looks at herself in the mirror. This feels weird.

She thinks about calling one of her friends and having a girls' night or something, but she doesn't know if she can explain it. Not even to her closest friends... what's she supposed to tell them? The sex with Ezra didn't live up to the expectations, and she also had a sexual dream about Jason DiLaurentis, who happens to be the half brother of two of her best friends. She can't tell Emily, either. Emily's dating Alison, as odd as she still finds it. 

She can tell Hanna, but Hanna's got a big mouth sometimes. That girl gets tipsy quite often, too. She'll drink too much one night and spill to somebody else. The only one she  _really_ trusts is Spencer, but she knows how awkward it'll be if she tells Spencer that she had a dream about her own half brother. No one wants to hear about how their best friend has sex dreams about their brother.

She sighs and watches TV to take her mind off of it. Not the best strategy, but it's all she's got for now.

* * *

 

It's getting darker outside, and Ezra still isn't home. She supposes the meeting is going on longer than expected, but just rolls her eyes and finds herself stalking Jason's social network accounts. She doesn't know why, but she likes to see what he was up to when they were apart. He's done some traveling. There are photos of him with girls in California, where he resided, too. But he's gone all over the place. There's photos tagged in London, Paris, Australia... the guy has been busy.

She shudders at the realization that she's stalking Jason, and leaves his page to refresh the regular posts again. And that's when she sees Ezra at some sort of party. 'Meeting'. He's got his arm around Catherine Steele and some other man. She never knew the teacher life could be so filled with parties. She rolls her eyes.

And that's when she gets out of bed. She puts on a tank top and a pair of jean shorts, despite the fact that it's quite cold outside. She gets in her car and drives to the old DiLaurentis house, assuming that he's back there. She doesn't even know if he is, but she's got a feeling.

Against her better judgment, she knocks on the door of the house, crossing her fingers that he opens the door. It can't be Alison. She's got her own place with Emily. Mrs. DiLaurentis is dead, and Kenneth moved out to be with a new woman after her death. It's got to be Jason. They never sold the house.

"Aria Montgomery, funny seeing you at my door."

And it's him. She feels relieved, but nervous at the same time.

"Please don't judge me for coming here—"

"I wouldn't dare," he laughs, opening the door further for her. "How'd you know I'd be here?"

"Lucky guess," she shrugs her shoulders. "You don't feel weird about moving back into your old place?"

"Trust me, I do. It still gives me the creeps from everything that went on back then. It makes me think of my mom a lot, too. But it's the only place I've got right now," he explains, leaning back against the door once he shuts it.

"I'm sorry," she says.

"It's not your fault," he raises his eyebrows. "But I'm gonna get out of here when I can. I don't want to be in this house forever. Maybe someday I'll get my own house, and have a normal life. I'm getting older, but I don't seem to be getting anymore stable, so I'm just gonna not get my hopes up about it." He sighs and chuckles. "I'm guessing you didn't come here to talk about my life," he says.

"I don't mind," she says with a smile.

"Nah, it's cool. I've never liked talking about my crap anyways."

"But I do like listening," she tells him.

"That's not why you came here, though," he smirks. "You came here because you want something. Care to tell me what that is, pretty girl?"

"You need to hear it?" she asks.

"It'll be a turn on to hear it," he responds with a laugh. 

"We'll start with this. Do you have any beer? Anything to drink, actually?" she asks.

"I see you're trying to recreate last night, but I told you, I've been sober for a while now, and I'd rather not fall back into that place I was in before," he explains to her. 

"Get drunk with me," she breathes out, pushing him onto the couch. She leans closer to his face, pressing her lips against his. The kiss is passionate and long. She tugs on the collar of his shirt, deepening the kiss. "Jason, I want this."

"Well, this is a good night," he laughs. "You wanna get drunk, forget your problems, and screw me? I think I can spare my sobriety for one night." She gets off of him and lets him go to the kitchen. He returns with four cans of beer.

"Four?" Aria asks.

"You're not gonna get drunk with just one," he reminds her. He looks at her for a long moment while she pops open the first beer an, and sips it. He does the same with his own. "Aria, are you sure you want to do this? This might be the point of no return. I think the cheating thing is hot and all, but if your guilty conscience is gonna fuck you up, I don't want to be a part of it."

"I made the sober decision to come here. I had sex with Ezra today for the first time in a long time," she confesses to him, and he immediately knows where this is going. "It wasn't very good."

" _Oh_ , I see. You had bad sex with the boyfriend and are coming to  _me_ to make you feel good," he laughs. "What changed your mind? Bad sex was enough to make you want to cheat on him? You were ranting about how you love him so much earlier. I can handle being the backup plan, but I like to know where it's coming for before I indulge."

"I had a dream," she admits, looking up at him worriedly. "We were gonna, you know..." she blushes. "And I liked it, okay? I can't stop thinking about it, I don't even know why. We haven't seen each other in forever, and I suddenly want this? It doesn't make sense to me, so don't ask me to explain it."

"Alright," he says. "But I must warn you. Once you start this, you probably won't be able to stop it."

"I doubt you're _that_ good," she scoffs.

He raises his eyebrow, smirking at her.

"Wait and see. You can be the judge of that."

She's slightly surprised, but presses the beer can to her lips and drinks it up.

* * *

A few beer cans later— they go way past the initial four Jason brought out— they're a little tipsy. Not insanely drunk, but drunk enough to be a little slurry with their words, and slightly handsier than they'd normally be. But they still know what they're doing. And Aria jumps back onto his lap, looping her arms around him and making out with him to no end. She begins unbuttoning his shirt while he successfully gets his tongue into her mouth. 

 She pushes his shirt off his shoulders, and tosses it to the floor, reconnecting their lips in the process. Her hand runs down his abs slowly, feeling every perfectly sculpted muscle of his body. Dammit, she remembers how she used to think about how good his body was. She's shocked she can remember thinking about him from when she was sixteen. So much time has passed. She shakes out of her thoughts, and fumbles with the button on his jeans.

"Hell no, I wanna see some more skin here," he grins, and then pushes her down against the couch so he's dominating. "Don't you think it's a little unfair how much you're wearing? Let's even the score."

She smirks at him and lifts tank top over her head. He stares in amazement. Fuck, she looks so good. He feels himself hardening immediately at the sight of her topless. He's filled with eagerness to tear that bra off, and see everything he missed out on when she ended their fling in high school. His hands ease to hold her back, and move towards the clasp of her bra, which he snaps off, and slowly pushes it down her stomach. His blue eyes lock on her breasts when her bra comes off, and he can't close his mouth.

"Staring isn't very polite," she jokes. She puts her hand on the back of his neck, and pulls him in for a kiss. 

He lets her bra fall off the couch. While they are kissing, his hands move upwards to grab her breasts. He massages them slowly, making her moan into their kisses. He tugs on her nipple, causing her to moan so loudly against his lips. He fucking loves the sound of her moaning. It's everything he dreamed of. Her moans are so orgasmic. He hates to know that Ezra has been lucky enough to have her whenever he wants, yet doesn't use his chances. God, if he could have her, he'd fucking give her everything he could. She is a literal fucking dream.

He pulls back from her, and lets his mouth go down. He sucks on her neck and toys with her breasts. She feels so satisfied even though the actual sex hasn't even begun. He's a God at foreplay, she knows that already. Maybe he wasn't lying about being so good at sex...

He continues moving down until his mouth is at her breasts. He takes one into his mouth and sucks on it lightly. Her moans grow louder and louder. She feels herself getting wetter at every gesture. Embarrassingly wet. She's afraid he's going to make fun of her when he gets her shorts off and sees how damn wet she is under those panties.

Her nipples harden while he keeps going down. His tongue strokes down her stomach until he's reached her jean shorts. With one quick gesture, he pops the button off and begins dragging her shorts down her legs. He tosses them off the couch, and smirks at the sight of her lacy panties. Oh, she so fucking wanted this. She wore matching lingerie and everything.

Finally, he loops his finger around her panties and starts dragging them off as well. Slowly and teasingly, letting the anxiety and lust grow in her. He knows she needs him to do more and go further, but he's playing with her. Letting her die for his touch so bad. He can already see how when she is while he's removing her panties, and it's his mission to arouse her even more.

"My God,  _Jason_ ," she moans. _  
_

Hearing her say his name like that... fuck. He loves it. He wants to hear more. He needs to hear more.

And she can't take it anymore. Waiting for him like this. She practically shoves him back, taking control of the situation. She plans to dominate him now. He's startled by her suddenly taking charge, but eases into it while she does all the work of removing his jeans for him. She practically yanks them off, and throws them onto the floor. She can see the giant bulge through his boxers. His boxers: the fucking last barrier between her getting what she wants.

She has a bit of trouble getting his boxers off, but he uses his own hands to help her. She grows dizzy once his boxers come off. Fuck, it's big. She had a feeling it was going to be good, and it is. The sight of it makes her all the more excited to jump on him. Her hand flies towards his cock and grips it in place. Like a cat, she pounces on top of him and lets him sink inside of her.

" _Oh_ ," she moans out as she sits on top of him while he's inside of her. He's back against the couch, letting her do all the work. He closes his eyes and groans in pleasure.

She begins riding him. She moves up and down on top of his cock. It slides with ease because of how wet she is. Her hands fly over to his hair. Her fingers run through his hair, messing it up, but he really doesn't give a fuck because he's too obsessed with the fact that  _they're_ fucking.

This isn't what he wanted, though. Well, of course he wants this mind-blowing pleasure the sexy-ass sight of Aria Montgomery riding him, but he wanted to be in control. He knows he's going to have to repay her after this if there's a round two. And he's hoping there is. He can take charge and prove to her that he's as good at sex as he said he is. He's not the type of guy to really care whether he's in control or not, but he's currently got the urge to show her he can fuck her like nobody else can. And he's not going to prove that point much when she's got all the control.

* * *

They do end up reaching their second round. After he gets her to orgasm, which he greatly enjoys the sound of, he gets her into his bedroom, and they do it again. Only this time, he keeps her on the bottom so he can dominate. He gets to do whatever he wants to her body. He knows she'll be convinced about how good he is once they're done because he can hear the way she moans at every touch. There's no way she could be faking this.

"Fuck!" she cries out and breathes heavily. She tumbles back down to hit her head against the pillow, completely out of breath.

He grins at the sound of that, and looks over at her. Her eyes are shut, but he can see her bare stomach moving up and down. He turns over to the side to look at her.

"Did I do you well?" he asks with a laugh.

She rolls her eyes and stretches her legs as far as she can.

"My legs," she groans.

"Aw, did I wear you out? I guess the boyfriend can't do this to you, can he? Gentle lovemaking can get a little boring. It's good you finally got somebody to do you right in the bedroom... and the couch," he jokes.

_Ezra, Ezra, Ezra_. Damn. He's probably already arrived home, wondering where she is.

"I should go. Ezra must be home from his meeting by now," Aria says, reaching over to grab her clothes.

Jason gives her a disappointed look.

"You're leaving?" he asks. "You get what you want and then you ditch me?"

"I thought we both knew that's what this is when I came here. I never said I'm going to commit to you or anything. This was just sex, Jason. I needed to feel good after, and that's what you gave me. So, thanks," she says.

He purses his lips.

"I know, I never asked you to commit to anything. But come on, why don't you spend the night?" he asks. 

"Spend the night at someone else's house? What's Ezra going to think when I don't come home at all?" she reminds.

"Tell him you're sleeping over at a friend's house. Tell him you're with Spencer!" he tries.

"More lying, more secrets... I've already exceeded my limit," she says.

"Oh, you think it can get any worse?" he laughs. "Aria, you already had sex with another guy. What worse thing could you do to him? You think it's not a sin to fuck around with me, but then it is to sleep over? You've already done the worst. Face it."

"Thanks, I feel like a true slut now," she rolls her eyes. "You  _know_ I want to stay. So bad."

"Then do it," he says, grabbing her arm gently. He leans closer to her and kisses her. He pulls her back on top of him, and their kissing grows way more intense than it should have. She pulls back, but remains on top of him.

"I just don't think it's a good idea. He'll get suspicious," Aria reminds and cups his cheeks. "I'm sorry."

She gets off of him, and grabs her clothes again. He sighs in disappointment as she slides her clothes back on and leaves his bedroom. He hears the door shut, and knows she's gone.

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aria fears a major consequence to her actions with Jason the morning after.

Aria takes a cab home. When she arrives, she makes up some lie and says she was with Spencer. He buys it. He has no reason to doubt her, anyways. He tells her about how he called her like he said, but she says they were watching a movie so she didn't hear her phone ring. They both fall asleep quickly that night. Aria is worn out from her night with Jason, and Ezra is extremely worn out from his board meeting.

By the time she wakes up the next morning, Ezra's already gone to work. For a moment she's relaxed. But then she remembers two things that ruin her morning: one- she left her car at Jason's house, and Ezra probably noticed it on his way to work. Two (the even worse thing) - she and Jason  _didn't_ use a condom. And she's most certainly not on the pill from the lack of action she's been getting from Ezra.

Her phone buzzes. She feels heat rising to her cheeks. Thoughts about how Ezra's texting to question her about the car form in her mind. She trembles as she picks her phone up from the nightstand. Luckily, it's just a message from Jason.

_Forgot your car? I woke up early just to drop it off. You're welcome babe ;) now your bf won't know_

She's extremely relieved to know he dropped the car off, but annoyed he sent a text like this. She quickly texts back.

_thank god. but fuck you. don't text me stuff like this. ezra could have seen it_

He takes that as a hint to not text her back. She still has another problem to worry about: she could have gotten fucking pregnant last night because she's certain they didn't use a condom. They were so into the moment that they forgot all about protection. The only thing she can think about that may or may not save her is emergency contraception. 

She knows she has to get it as soon as possible, so she quickly gets into her car and drives to the nearest pharmacy. She's never done this before, so she has no clue where the store would place their emergency contraception. She finds the aisle labeled as 'Pregnancy & Parenting Products', which makes her heart sink. Fucking God, she could be pregnant with Jason  _or_ Ezra's baby, but most likely Jason's. She doesn't know what she was thinking when she slept with another guy, especially her best friend's brother.

Tears are threatening to fall out of her eyes. God, she can't be pregnant. No, not now. She feels like such a slut for sleeping with Jason. It's not that she'd never consider being a mother, it's just that the situation is terrible: she could be pregnant with a baby that's not her boyfriend's. Ezra would never speak to her again, and would most certainly be out of her life forever if he figured it out. So, she'd have to sneak around and abort the baby without him ever knowing. She hates thinking about how this could all go down. Her hand trembles as she reaches towards the emergency contraception. Who knows if it will even work?

"Aria?"

Her eyes widen when she hears the raspy voice call her name: it's Spencer. Fuck. She would much rather have it be Emily, or even Hanna. She can't lie to Spencer and tell her that the baby probably belongs to Jason. She'll be horrified that they slept together.

"Spence!" she cries in shock. "H-hey... what are you doing here?"

"I came to get advil," Spencer responds. "Toby's been really sick lately, and I hate seeing him this way. He's got a horrible fever and such a bad headache. I'm taking some time off of work to take care of him."

"Aw, poor him," Aria says, biting her lip and holding the emergency contraception behind her back.

"I wasn't expecting to see  _you_ here. Especially not in the pregnancy aisle," Spencer laughs. "Are you pregnant?"

Aria's mouth trembles. She's struggling to say the words, and seeing Spencer only makes it harder. God, she doesn't even know if she's pregnant, but it's going to be horrible if she has to explain the situation of how she  _might_ _be pregnant with Jason DiLaurentis's baby_.

"No," she quickly responds. "I mean, I don't know— maybe." She's about to cry now. The tears fall from her face.

"Ar, why are you crying?" Spencer asks, coming closer to hug her. "What's wrong? It's not a bad thing to be pregnant. Are you getting the test? I'll stay with you when you take it, if you want."

"Spencer, I can't be pregnant. I'm not ready. And it's just," she sighs. She can't even tell her best friend what she did, so who is she going to tell? The only person she can actually confide in is Jason, and he'll probably run away in disgust knowing that he got her pregnant. He's not looking to be her baby daddy. "I'm not ready. I'm getting the emergency contraception because I don't want this, Spence."

"Is having a baby all that bad?" Spencer asks her. "You and Ezra have always been there for each other. He's going to support you through this. He'll be ecstatic to know that you're pregnant!"

"I've already been calling in sick to work and lying like every day.. I can't take care of a baby. Ezra has a job, I have a job, and..." she begins, but she can't say the 'and' part: this probably isn't even Ezra's baby. "I like my job too much to quit it. And Ezra— he loves teaching so much. It would kill him to have to give that up. I don't want to be the one to take that away from him."

"Aria, I know what kind of guy Ezra is. He would never choose his job over you or your kids," Spencer tells her. "And it's not like he'd have to quit forever. Just until the baby is old enough to stay at home alone."

"That's going to take years..." she sighs. "I don't even know if I'm pregnant!"

"But if you are, it's not the end of the world. And I'm going to be here to support you. You have me, you have Ezra, you have all of our friends. In fact, Jason just got back from California. He doesn't really have much to do, so he's got a lot of free time on his hands. Whatever it is, you're going to get through it. I know Ezra would be happy if you're pregnant," Spencer explains. "So, it's not a bad thing. Don't be afraid."

Aria wishes she could tell her so badly. Tears start pouring down her face.  _Jason_. If it's his kid, he won't have this kind of free time on his hands if she chooses to have it. If she's pregnant, she can't keep it. She can't have Jason's baby right now. There's too much at stake, and too much to figure out. She and Jason are not in a relationship, it just won't work.

"Aria," Spencer coaxes, stroking her hair. "What is wrong? You're  _that_ afraid of being a mom? The day's going to have to come eventually. We're at that age where this isn't uncommon anymore. It's not like getting pregnant while you're a teenager. This is perfectly normal. You have a loving boyfriend who is going to help you. You're never going to be alone."

"You don't get it," she sobs.

"Then help me understand!" Spencer pleads. "What's going on, Ar? Did something happen between you and Ezra?"

"No, we're still together," Aria answers.

"Then what's the problem? I remember you saying that you'd be happy to start a family, too!" Spencer reminds.

"We're still together, Spence, but nothing's the same anymore. We've been fighting a lot lately, and I screwed up," Aria confesses. She needs to confide in her best friend, even if that means telling her she hooked up with Jason. "I screwed up  _so_ bad."

"How bad?" Spencer asks, raising her eyebrows. "Ar... what did you do? You and Ezra have been through so much together. Whatever you did, I'm sure you can fix it."

"But I can't!" Aria cries, clinging onto her in a hug. "Spencer, I cheated on him. I slept with somebody else, and we didn't use protection. So, if I'm pregnant, it's most likely not Ezra's, because we haven't been very.. you know,  _active_ , lately, and when we did, we used protection."

Spencer's eyes go wide.

"You  _cheated_?" Spencer asks, shocked. "Ar, why? Why would you do that? He loves you!"

"I  _know_ ," she sobs. "I know he does, but everything has been bad between us, and I just turned for comfort to somebody else. And now I regret it so badly. I wish it never happened. I can't be pregnant, and I can't lose Ezra."

Spencer wishes she could say it's going to be okay, but she's not sure it is. The baby issue can be solved— she can abort the baby, care for it with the real baby daddy, or raise it on her own. But cheating on her boyfriend? She's not sure he's going to forgive her for this one.

"He's going to be so heartbroken, and you know it," Spencer quietly says. "This is so out of character for you to hurt him like that. Even when things are getting bad, you're never supposed to try and hurt the person you love!" She puts a hand on her forehead. "Who was it?"

"What?" Aria chokes. She knew it was coming, but she's still afraid to answer.

"Who did you sleep with?" she clarifies.

"You're never going to forgive me if you find out," Aria sobs. "I'm so sorry..."

"That's not true," Spencer tells her. "I have been your best friend through thick and thin. We have been through everything together, including the worst relationship problems. There's nobody you can say that I'm going to hate you for. Well, as long as it's not Toby. It isn't him, right?"

"No!" Aria cries. "I screwed up, but I'd never do  _that_."

"Then you can't make me hate you. Who is it?" Spencer asks.

She stares at the ground and quietly utters out, "It was Jason."

Spencer presses her lips together. Why is she not surprised? Well, she's certainly not thrilled to know her best friend hooked up with her half brother, but it's not the craziest thing in the world. She always suspected they had a thing for each other back in high school, but she never pressed on it too much.

"Do you hate me?" Aria asks.

"Of course not," Spencer shakes her head. "I mean, it's sorta weird, but he's a grown-ass man. He makes his own decisions, and I'm not going to hold it against you. Besides, he's a looker."

Aria laughs.

"Did you just say that about your own brother?" she laughs.

" _What_? I'd have to be a lesbian to say he's ugly," Spencer shamelessly shrugs. "Anyways, disregarding that creepy and incestuous thought, it's okay. Well, I mean, it's okay to me. For as long as I can remember, Jason's like, been totally in love with you. And, I did sorta think you guys had a thing for each other back in high school. As for Ezra, he's not going to be happy. At all."

"I know," Aria sighs. "What do I do?"

"Take the emergency contraception first. You'll have to wait a little while, but then you can take a pregnancy test," Spencer says. "And.. don't tell Jason just yet, okay? I know if he even figures out that you  _think_ you might be pregnant, he'll drop everything and start buying cribs. He'll flip out. I know it. For some reason, he's got this soft spot for you."

Aria raises her eyebrows.

"He does?" she asks.

"Don't pretend like you're blind. I knew he liked you, I just didn't think you liked him back," Spencer shrugs.

"Well, we  _did_ have a thing for each other in high school," Aria confesses.

Spencer's mouth opens in shock.

"Way to tell me years after!" Spencer cries. "Some best friend you are.. I've told you every person I've been with!"

"To say the least, your life hasn't been that scandalous. The worst it got was the whole sister's boyfriend thing. Actually, that was pretty scandalous. But after that, it was just Toby, Toby, Toby all the time," Aria shrugs.

"Excuse you, I'd rather be stable than have cheated on my boyfriend," Spencer reminds, causing Aria's heart to sink again. She remembers how she screwed up and feels bad all over again.

"You're right. I'm sorry, Spence. I'm glad you found somebody you're happy with," Aria says, and pats her shoulder. "I should probably get home and take this before Ezra comes home from work."

"Alright," Spencer smiles. "Look, if you need _anything_ , just call me. Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?"

"Thanks, but I think I should deal with this on my own for now. Besides, you have a sick boyfriend to take care of. Get him his advil and stop abandoning him," Aria laughs.

"Okay, okay. But remember: call me if you need anything," Spencer says.

Aria hugs her.

"I love you Spence, you know that?" she says.

"Love you, too," she smiles and starts walking away.

Aria picks up some pregnancy tests on her way to the checkout counter. She's going to need them in a few days to check if she's pregnant or not.

* * *

She goes home and takes the emergency contraception. She hides the box in her bag— she knows she can't have it just laying around the house, or Ezra will find it. She also hides the pregnancy tests. Once she's done, she hears the doorbell ring and goes downstairs to open the door. 

"Jason!" she cries in surprise. "Why are you at my house?"

"You came to mine last night, remember?" he chuckles. "Surprisingly, despite how many drinks I had, I can remember every detail clearly. It sucked when you left me. I was having a lot of fun."

"I'm sure you were..." she mumbles.

"I missed you," he says, leaning in and kissing her lips.

She doesn't fight it, despite knowing that it's so stupid and wrong to continue this. He lets his hand rest on her cheek as they kiss passionately in the doorway.

"I can't," she mumbles. "I really can't. Ezra could be home any minute, and I can't."

"Then come over to my place," he whispers as he starts kissing her neck.

"Jason, no," she says, stepping back. "Maybe it was just a one time thing."

"Considering you kissed me back, I don't think it was," he laughs.

"It doesn't make sense!" Aria cries. "Don't you see how it is? I'm in a relationship with another guy. We're living together. This isn't some random relationship I can just jump out of."

"You had no trouble coming to my house and screwing me, so clearly it's something you were willing to screw up," he rolls his eyes and folds his arms. "If you didn't want this, you wouldn't have come on to me. You could have never contacted me again, but you chose to. So stop pretending like this is one-sided."

"I'm not leaving Ezra for you," she tells him.

"I'm not asking you to," he says.

"You'd continue to see me even if I openly just chose him over you?" Aria asks, surprised. "Last time, when I chose him, you stopped pursuing me completely and left me alone. What changed?"

"I realized I'd rather have some part of you than have no part of you at all," he says, reaching over for her hand. "But I'll stop chasing after you. If you're not looking to have this fling thing anymore, then I'll back off. But I still want you in my life."

"So, you want to be friends?" Aria asks, raising her eyebrows.

"Essentially," he responds, shrugging his shoulders. "What do you say, pal?" He chuckles.

"I don't know if I can call you a friend now that I've seen your penis," she jokes.

Jason smiles at her. 

"Friends with  _benefits_ , then," he corrects.

She rolls her eyes playfully.

"You need to leave, Jas."

"Fine, fine, but I hope you won't start depriving me of your company. I've spent enough years without you around. Now that I've sorta got you back in my life, I'm hopin' you're not gonna cut me off," he admits, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Oh, I'll think about it," she jokes.

"Call me?" he tries.

" _Goodbye_ , Jason!" Aria laughs, rolling her eyes.

"Alright, alright, I'll go," he chuckles. "Later, Ar."

"Later," she waves.

For a moment, she almost forgot that she could be pregnant with his baby...

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Aria begins to deal with her potential pregnancy, situations become more complex with Ezra and Jason, respectively.

Aria decides she's been away from work for long enough. She loves her job a lot, so losing it is not an option. She goes back to work the following day, although she's freaking out in anxiety as she waits for it to be long enough from the day she and Jason slept together to take a pregnancy test. She only has to wait a few more days.

When she comes home, she's surprised to see that Ezra is already home. He's grinning at her like a fool, and comes to hug her.

"What's with the goofy expression?" Aria asks, scratching her head.

"You didn't tell me you think that you might be pregnant!" Ezra exclaims, and cradles her face in his hands. "Oh, Aria, this is.. wow. I don't even know how we're going to deal with it if it's true, but I'm so happy.. for us. You could be having my baby. _Our_  baby."

Aria nearly chokes when he says this. She bats her eyes in confusion. How?  _How_ can he possibly know?

"Ezra—" she starts.

"I'm not mad at you for not telling me," he laughs. "I know you were probably worried that I'd freak out, but I hope you know that I'm all right. I'm happy, if anything. I know we don't know if it's true or not, but if it is, I'm going to be there with you every step of the way. We're in this together. Things have been rough between us, but that could never stop us. I'm not going to let it stop us from being a happy family."

"It's probably not even true, I'm just.. being cautious," she mumbles. "Ezra, how did you find out?"

"I was looking for some of my papers, and I found the pregnancy tests in your bag," he responds. "It's okay, though."

Aria swallows hard. Fuck, this is bad.

"It's no big deal if it isn't true, but if it is.. think about it, Aria. Think about how great it can be. We could be a real family, raising our little boy or girl," Ezra grins. "We haven't talked about the future like that, but I'm all in." He kisses her passionately, cupping her cheeks as he does so. "I love you so much," he breathes out. "So much, Aria Montgomery. No matter what trouble our relationship is going through, I'll never stop loving you."

 _Oh, he'd stop loving me if he knew what I've done_ , Aria thinks as Ezra holds her in his arms.

* * *

The next day, she goes to work again. A little past 12, she decides it's time to take a lunch break, and leaves the office. As soon as she exits the building, a car pulls up right next to her. The door opens, and Jason walks outside. He folds his arms and gives her a look.

"Jason!" she says, startled. "Why are you here? I'm working today—"

"I  _know_ , but I can't come around the house after you work since Ezra might be there," Jason says. He sounds a lot more emotionless than usual. "I'm not here for any funny business, though. This is serious."

"Alright..." Aria furrows her eyebrows. "Make it quick, I'm going to go get lunch. What do you need?"

"You're pregnant," Jason says with anger.

Aria sighs, running a hand through her hair.

"Did Spencer tell you?" Aria asks. "It's not even for sure. I don't know if I am, okay? Stop freaking out."

"No, she didn't tell me. She'd never break your girl bond like that. Your  _boyfriend_  ran into us. I was out helping Spencer go grocery shopping, and he came up to us in the store today. He told me that you're pregnant. With  _his_ baby. Well, he said he's 'pretty sure' you're pregnant," Jason grits his teeth as he speaks.

Aria rolls her eyes.

"I can't believe he'd say that!" Aria cries. "I'm not even the least bit sure! I bought pregnancy tests to make sure, and he found them. Now he thinks I'm pregnant."

"Aria, listen to me: is there any chance that  _I'm_ the father?" Jason asks.

She sighs.

"Most likely. But we don't even know if I'm pregnant," she reminds.

"But what if you are, Aria?" Jason asks. "What if you  _are_ pregnant? That baby probably isn't his, it's probably mine. And I'm not mad that you're pregnant. In fact, I would give everything up and help you raise the baby if it's true. What's pissing me off is that he's gonna think it's his baby, and you're gonna let him. You're gonna let him raise a kid that's mine."

"Don't think like that. I took emergency contraception. I can't be pregnant," Aria shakes her head.

"That doesn't always work," he reminds.

"Well, what do you want me to do!?" Aria cries. "Tell Ezra that I fucking cheated on him, and that this baby isn't going to be his if i am pregnant? I can't do that."

"If it's true, you could. You're not going to let me be with a kid that's mine?" Jason asks.

"This is so hypothetical! I'm probably not even pregnant, Jason!" Aria yells.

"Aria, if you are, I want to be a part of the baby's life," he says in an extremely calm voice. "I know you probably think I'm going to be a jackass dad that would never be there, but that's not true. I'll get a job, find a place for us to stay.. I'd make it all right again. I'd make sure we're okay, even if you don't trust that."

Aria's eyes ease. She can't believe  _Jason DiLaurentis_ is willing to do all of that.

"You actually want to become a father and give up your life?" Aria asks. "I'm not asking you to do that."

"I'm volunteering. If I'm his dad, it's what I want to do. And if you don't want that, then fine. But I'm still going to be a part of his or her life," Jason warns. "You're not cutting me out of their life for the sake of keeping your jacked up relationship with Ezra."

 She smiles at him.

"Even though we don't know if it's true or not, I really appreciate that you'd say that," Aria tells him.

"I didn't just say it. I meant it, Aria. I'd give up everything I have to raise this child," Jason assures her. "You can't take the kid and let them believe that Ezra is their father. If you need someone to be there when you take the pregnancy test, I'll be happy to be there, just so you know."

"Thanks, but I think I should be alone for that. I even turned down Spencer's help, so don't take it personally," Aria says.

"Okay," Jason nods his head. "I'm here, though.. for you. And the baby, if there is one."

Aria's amazed by him. They're not dating. They really aren't much except people who hooked up, since they haven't talked enough recently to be friends. Despite this, he's still willing to raise the baby. Most guys who knock girls up from one-night-stands go running away so they don't have to take responsibility for their actions. She always thought Jason was one of those guys, but apparently he's settled enough to be serious about raising a baby.

* * *

"Ezra!" Aria yells when she gets home.

She sees her boyfriend is already home. He's in their bedroom reading one of his classic novels. He puts his book down and gives her a sweet smile, despite her angry tone when she yelled his name.

"Hey, sweetheart. Is everything all right?" Ezra asks, furrowing his eyebrows. "Something happen at work?"

"No," she angrily says. "Work is perfectly fine.  _You're_ not."

"Aria—" he begins.

"No! How could you tell Spencer and Jason that I'm pregnant?" Aria asks, grabbing his collar. "Ezra, I would understand if I were actually surely pregnant, but I haven't got the slightest clue if I am. I didn't buy the pregnancy tests because I'm suspecting I'm pregnant, I bought them just in case. There have been no signs that I'm pregnant! And you told them I am?"

"Sorry," he sighs. "Sorry, I just.. I've got a feeling, okay? I want it to be true."

"Why?" Aria demands. "Why would you want me to be pregnant right now? We've both got things to handle. Now is just not the time to be worrying about starting a family!"

Ezra grins and pulls her on his lap.

"It is. Now is the  _perfect_ time, actually," he tells her. "Aria, we've both clearly been stressed from work and our fights, and our relationship has been struggling. This possible pregnancy feels like.. a beacon of hope, you know? Something that would bring us back together and make us close again. Close— just like we used to be." He chuckles to himself. "Remember when we were so young and in love? That feeling of being invincible. We were like star-crossed lovers. It was the best feeling I've ever had, sweetie. I want to be that again. Not so much the star-crossed lovers part, but I want to have that epic love we used to. I feel like this baby could bring us back together." 

"And what if I'm not pregnant, which is very likely?" Aria asks.

"Then, it's okay, of course. But I was thinking that we could start trying for a baby if it turns out to be untrue, because I'd like to start a family with you," Ezra says.

Aria nods her head, but she can't have a baby with him right now. She cheated on him! Jason's probably freaking out. Spencer probably thinks she's stupid— she probably thinks Aria told Ezra she's pregnant, right? Aria just wants to crawl into a hole and forget about all her problems. She doesn't want to deal with this anymore. And she knows perfectly well that it's her fault for sleeping with Jason, but she still wishes things weren't so complicated.

* * *

 

A few more days pass. It's officially safe for her to take the pregnancy test and get accurate results, so she calls in sick at work that day. Once Ezra has gone to work, she goes into the bathroom and takes the test. She really does wish someone is with her as she waits for the timer to go off. Maybe she shouldn't have turned down Spencer and Jason's requests to help her out...

Even if she isn't pregnant, she's still going to have to deal with what she did. She can't just stay with Ezra after what she did. 

The timer on her phone beeps, and her heart begins pounding rapidly when she realizes she's going to find out if she's pregnant or not right now. Slowly, she twists the bathroom's doorknob and walks inside. Closing her eyes, she picks up the pregnancy test. She takes a deep breath and opens her eyes, then glances down. It's not positive.

Relief surges through her. A giant smile appears on her face, and she runs over to her bed and falls on it in excitement. Of course, her problems with Jason and Ezra don't end here, but she doesn't have to deal with raising the baby. She decides she's going to tell Jason in person, and drives over to his house. She'll tell Ezra when he comes home from work. He's going to be disappointed, which will be difficult, since he's also going to want to continue trying for a baby now.

Jason opens the door and presses his lips together when he sees that it's Aria.

"I'm guessing you took the pregnancy test," Jason says, sighing. "I'm ready to know, if that's what you're here for."

She grins at him and hugs him as tight as she can. He's in shock, but hugs her back.

"Aria?" he asks in confusion and pulls back from the hug. "Does that mean...?"

"Yeah," she responds. "I'm not pregnant, you don't have to worry. No need to give everything up."

He nods his head.

"Alright. Dodged a bullet," he shrugs. "Even though it wouldn't exactly be the worst thing in the world, would it? I'm not getting any younger by the day. Having a kid would have been pretty cool. I would have loved that kiddo to the ends of the earth."

She rolls her eyes.

"Seriously, you wanted me to be pregnant?" she asks.

"Well, I'm probably not fit for the job of being a daddy just yet, but it would have given me a reason to be around you some more," he confesses. "It's killing me to not be around you. I haven't talked to you in days."

"You went years without talking to me," Aria reminds.

"I know. But, now that you're in my head again, I can't exactly get you out," he says, shrugging his shoulders. "So, this is it between us then, I guess? You can go running back to Ezra, as usual. Spare him the details of our night together. He wouldn't be able to take it."

Aria presses her lips together.

"We don't have to never speak to each other again.. you know that, right?" Aria furrows her eyebrows. "Why are you acting like this is goodbye? You're still in Rosewood, and I'm still in Rosewood. We're in the same damn town, Jason!"

" _Because_ , Aria, you're going to stay with him, and you've made it clear you're not looking for anything more with me. The baby would have been the only reason you stuck around me. Now that  _that_ fiasco has been dealt with, you don't need me anymore. And I know you're gonna say we can be friends and all that crap, but it's too hard for me. I got too much of you to go back to being friends. And it's gonna fucking suck if I have to be your bestie and talk to you about your relationship issues," he tells her. 

"You're gonna be fine without me," Aria informs him. "You've been on your own all this time. You haven't been near me all this time. You're doing just fine."

Jason shuts his eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath.

"Nah, you're never gonna get it," he shakes his head.

"Get what?" Aria asks.

"That I spent all these years fuckin' alone," he grits his teeth. "I hated every day of my life, and I have for the longest time. When we had that fling or whatever in high school, it gave me hope. I was happy around you. Then I lost you, and things sucked again. And I got you now, but I lost you again. Things are gonna suck ass again."

She can't make promises she can't keep and tell him she's going to leave Ezra or something. She's not ready to deal with losing him, even if she's been falling out of love with him more and more each day. And she  _knows_ her feelings for Jason have been growing more and more by the day. It kills her she can't do anything about it. She already fucked up once by sleeping with him, and she can't do that to Ezra again.

"I should go," Aria tells him.

"Yeah, I thought you wouldn't get it," Jason says, nodding his head. "This feels familiar. Being left for Ezra Fitz once again."

"You  _knew_ I wasn't going to leave him when we hooked up that day!" Aria cries. "Jason! I told you that I'm not willing to leave him, and you said you were fine with it."

"Well, guess what? I fucking lied," he rolls his eyes. "I'm not fine with it. Sorry for lying. Good night."

"Jason—" she starts.

" _No_ , Aria, you've been so back and forth with me, it's ridiculous. I've tried so hard to be patient with you, but I can't do this anymore," he sighs, shaking his head. "I wish I could, but I know it's not good for me. You can't come to my house and sleep with me, and then pretend like you've never been interested in me. It doesn't work like that."

"I  _am_ interested in you!" Aria admits, but immediately regrets saying it.

Jason calms down. His eyes meet hers, and the anger washes away. 

"I really am," she continues. "But it's hard to just leave somebody you've been with for so long. How can I walk away from Ezra easily? He loves me a lot, and part of me still loves him, too. Things are just falling apart between us, and I don't know where I'm supposed to go. I'm confused, okay? And if you don't want to put up with that, then you don't have to. You can stay out of my life if that's what you really want."

He presses his lips together for a moment.

"That's not what I want," he says, shaking his head and reaching out to grab her arm gently. "That's  _never_ been what I want. The only reason I said that is because it's too hard when you treat me like we're nothing! I thought you didn't feel anything for me."

She tenses at his touch, struggling to think of what to do. She can very well make another mistake, or she can try and be better. She can go home to Ezra and devote herself to him again. She can become a better girlfriend.

But that's not what her heart is practically begging her to do. Instead, she lets Jason pull her body close so their bodies are touching. She lets him lean in even when she has time to stop it. She lets him kiss her. And she kisses him back, easing her hand to the back of his neck, going onto her tip topes to kiss him deeper. She likes it. God, she likes it so much. It feels so natural and right. The chemistry is there, and she can't deny it any longer. She can't deny that the chemistry with Ezra has been fading, but is off the charts with Jason. Even if she wants to deny it, she can't.

"Holy crap..." she mumbles when she leans back.

Jason blinks twice and steps back from her.

"Uh," he scratches his head. "I'm guessing you're not coming in."

"No.. I— I should get home," she tells him. 

"Right. Get home," he says bitterly. "To  _him_."

"Jason..." she mutters.

"No, no. Go on. I get it," he nods his head. He steps back further and shuts the door.

She touches her lips where Jason kissed her. She can remember that feeling so clearly, and she wants to feel it again. But she knows she can't go in there. He's probably pissed at her for running right back to Ezra, as she usually does.

* * *

When she gets home, Ezra is already there, and is watching TV. She smiles at him weakly, thinking about what she's just done. She feels so guilty. But, she's still unsure of what she's going to do, so she just continues going with the normal way of being with Ezra. She wraps her arms around him while he's sitting on the couch and watching TV. He turns to her and pecks her lips.

"Hey. Where'd you go?" he asks.

"I went out to eat with Spencer," she lies naturally.

"Oh," he nods his head. "How was it?"

"Good," she responds. "So, um, can we talk, Ez?"

"Sure," he says, nodding again. He mutes the TV and turns to face her. "What's up, Aria?"

She takes a deep breath— she knows how disappointed he's going to be when she reveals to him that she isn't pregnant. And she really doesn't want to start trying for a baby with him right now.

"You're scaring me," he says when she doesn't speak. "You said we need to talk, so what is it?"

"I took the pregnancy test," she begins. "I'm um.. I'm not pregnant, Ezra."

A disappointed look appears on his face, and he looks at the ground for a moment. But after a few seconds, he perks up and smiles at her. He pushes a strand of Aria's hair behind her ear, and then cups her cheeks.

"Hey, I told you it's totally fine if you're not pregnant. It's not the end of the world," he says. 

"I know. I just thought you'd be upset about it. I'm a little relieved. I don't think I'm ready to be a mom," she confesses.

He furrows his eyebrows.

"You don't want to have a kid right now?" he asks sadly. "Aria... I told you that I still want to try for a baby if you're not pregnant. And that thought remains. You don't want that?"

"Not right now, Ezra. I can't," she shakes her head.

"Why?" he demands. "Is work  _that_ difficult for you right now? I told you I really want this."

"Maybe  _you_ want it, but I don't," she snaps. "Having a child should be a mutual decision, and I'm not all in! I'm not ready for that. My mindset just isn't ready to be a mother. Why do you have to turn this back to my job?"

He sighs and runs a hand through his dark curls.

"I didn't mean to—" he begins.

"You didn't?" she questions. "It seemed like you did."

"Look, I'm just.. we're at that age," he explains. "Most of my colleagues and classmates from college and high school are already married and have children. We're so far from that place. We're dating and we have no plans for kids. Shouldn't we think about growing a little?"

"You can't convince me to want a baby," she rolls her eyes. "I'll tell you when I'm  _ready_."

"And when will that be?" he demands. "Five years? Ten years?  _Twenty years_? How long am I supposed to wait? Till I look like an old man and have gray hairs? I'm not as young as you are, Aria. I can't wait until I'm 40 to have children."

"I don't know how long!" Aria yells. "All I know is that I am not having a kid until I'm ready! That is the end of this discussion."

His mouth slams shut and he gives her a bitter look. His intention for this discussion was definitely not to have it go like this, he just snapped. He's wanted kids for a long time, and hearing her say she doesn't want them sets him off.

"Fine. Take all the time you need," he says emotionlessly. He grabs the remote, turns the TV off, and storms up to their bedroom.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the holidays arrive, Aria decides to take some time away from Jason and resolve her remaining issues with Ezra. However, when Jason shows up at Hanna's Christmas party, she can't exactly keep her distance from him.

"How many more days until Christmas?" Hanna whines. 

The five girls are sitting at an indoor table at the Brew— they've grown to like the outdoor tables, but the winter weather in Pennsylvania is much too harsh for that. Snow is to be expected in the upcoming days as Christmas comes closer.

"Are you putting out all your ho-hos for Jordan?" Spencer smirks, winking a few times.

"Maybe. But that is  _not_ why I'm excited for Christmas. I'm excited for Christmas because.. it's Christmas!" Hanna exclaims.

Spencer raises her eyebrows.

"You're not supposed to be the Christmas lover. That's my thing," Emily warns.

"You don't own the holidays," Hanna jokes.

"I've got a little early Christmas surprise for you, Han," Spencer says, causing Hanna's eyes to light up with joy. "Toby invited Caleb to come down to Rosewood to stay with us for the holidays. You'll be seeing a lot of him this holiday season."

Hanna seems to tense up, but keeps a cool face.

"And that's supposed to affect me how, Spence?" Hanna asks, giving her a proud look about how she seems to be brushing Caleb's return to Rosewood off. "I've got a boyfriend— a very serious one, too. Caleb and I broke up forever ago. I'm with Jordan now. In fact, we're hosting a New Year's party, so you can tell hacker boy that he can bring his ass down there. We can all be friends."

Spencer nods proudly.

"Wow, I thought you'd go into dramatic love triangle mode where you'd suddenly remember all your lovey-dovey feelings for the ex and become skeptical about the new relationship," Spencer says.

The brunette looks over at Aria.

"What about you?" Spencer asks. "Any plans for the holidays?"

"No, just the same old stay in Rosewood thing," Aria shrugs off.

"You know what we should do?" Emily lights up. She claps her hands together. Her friends look at her in curiosity to hear her idea. "A secret Santa sort of thing, just between us! You guys might think we're a little old and all, but it'll be fun. It'll be sweet."

"My girlfriend is a Christmas addict..." Alison mock-sighs jokingly, and squeezes Emily's hand.

Aria is still puzzled about their relationship. However, she knows she has no right to be judging, as their relationship is far more stable than both the ones in her life. She never thought it would be possible for Alison to settle down in a stable relationship, and certainly not in a stable relationship with Emily Fields.

 "I'm in," Hanna instantly agrees. "The more presents, the better!"

The group nods to Emily's idea in unison. And Aria isn't reluctant about her agreement for the secret Santa idea; she's thrilled to have something to take her mind off of all the drama in her life, not excluding that intense pregnancy scare she just had. Gift shopping should be fun. She gets to spend all this time thinking about her best friends instead of the men in her life.

"Let's do it," Spencer says, and grabs a mini notebook out of her purse. She rips it up into five little pieces of paper and writes each girl's name down on one. She looks around for something to put the ripped pieces of paper into. "Han, give me your beanie."

"No, this is my expensive one!" Hanna cries.

She rolls her eyes.

"It's just so we can draw names," Spencer explains. Reluctantly, Hanna removes her black North Face beanie and hands it to Spencer, who drops the ripped pieces of paper into it. She starts by holding the beanie out in front of Aria so she can draw a name.

Aria reaches inside and picks out a piece of paper. She retracts her arm and looks at it. A smile appears on her face when she discovers that she drew Spencer's name.

"Ooh, who'd you get?" Hanna asks curiously.

Emily rolls her eyes.

"Han, the whole point of this is that we don't know who everyone picked," Emily explains.

"Yeah, but I'm intrigued. It's killing me!" Hanna exclaims.

"You'll have to wait until Christmas," Aria winks.

The rest of the girls go on to draw their own names from the beanie. Aria's beyond ready to get some Christmas shopping done. As soon as she parts ways from the girls at the Brew, she heads over to the Rosewood Mall to go shopping for them. She goes to Nordstrom's and searches for dresses. She ends up purchasing this gorgeous dress that she believes absolutely screams Spencer—she just had to get it. She still wants to get more for her, but this is a great start.

It's not so fun shopping alone, though. She only likes coming to the mall when she's with her friends, but now she can't tell them who she's shopping for. And it'll be far too obvious if they do come along and see what she's buying for the person whose name she drew. So, she decides this is a great bonding opportunity— for Ezra and herself, that is.

The fight they had about having children was intense, and she's irritated by how things are going around the household. Of course she wants to fix it, but she doesn't know how to. She doesn't need him to be mad at her about this when he already has something far worse to be angry about. Although he doesn't know about it yet...

She invites Ezra to help her go Christmas shopping for Spencer. He doesn't seem super enthusiastic, but after a little begging, he agrees to come with her, and she's satisfied with that. He meets her at the Rosewood Mall.

"Are you sure you want my opinion about what to buy for your friends—" Ezra begins.

"Yes," she responds, reaching over and squeezing his hand. "Yes, I'm sure, Ez. Plus, I'd like your company here."

He nods his head, making Aria feel uncomfortable. She can tell how he's still angry with her, despite her efforts to fix things.

"You know what? We can shop in a little bit. Let's grab a bite to eat instead," Aria says.

"Whatever you want, of course," he agrees, although there's a huge amount of sarcasm and bitterness in his tone. 

"What?" Aria challenges his bitterness.

" _What_?" he fires back. "I'm just stating the truth. It's not like my opinion matters, anyways. The final verdict about everything in the household belongs to none other than Aria Montgomery!"

"Okay, because I don't want to have children right now it means that I never listen to what you suggest?" Aria rolls her eyes. "That's bullshit, Ezra, and you know it damn well. I'm not like that."

"Fine, whatever. Let's go eat," he says.

When she suggests Chinese food, he agrees, of course. Aria's sure it's just because he wants to prove a point to her about how they always do what she says. But she's still persistent in her beliefs: her not wanting to have kids is a totally different subject than listening to what he says. Having children just isn't something she wants right now, and she still believes he's going off on a tangent accusing her of never listening to his ideas.

"You always liked the spring rolls," Aria smiles, bringing up old memories for them as she sees Ezra wolfing down a spring roll at the table.

"Yeah," he agrees, unable to hide the emerging smile on his face. "Yeah, I did. But don't forget how much you loved the noodles here."

"That I do. In fact, I love everything here!" Aria exclaims. "Chinese food is so good."

 Ezra chuckles now. She can see that he's warming up to this.

"Ezra," she says, giving him the sweetest look possible. "Why do we have to be like this?"

His facial expression grows apologetic. He looks disappointed— not in her— but in himself. 

"I'm stupid," he says, sighing. "I got mad because I didn't get what I wanted. You not wanting to have children seemed almost like... I was losing you. Like I don't have you anymore. And I don't want that. I want to have you right here, sweetheart." He reaches over the table and takes her hand. He squeezes it gently, gazing into her eyes. "I do love you, Aria. I was angry, but I didn't stop loving you."

"Good, I was hoping you didn't," she smiles. She leans in to kiss his lips. God, she hasn't kissed him since they started fighting. It's not the most rewarding kiss, since it's a short peck, but she's happy things seem to be getting better between them now. "And for your information, you're not losing me. You're never going to lose me."

This feels like a lie. Part of their relationship has died, and they both know it. Part of her is dying to be with Jason right now, but the other part of her is still in love with this English-loving goofball sitting in front of her.

"Let's get shopping," Ezra says, stuffing the last spring roll into his mouth. "I'm gonna help you pick the best present ever for Spencer."

"Thank you!" Aria exclaims. "We're much better off when we work as a team."

Ezra smiles at her again.

* * *

Christmas day arrives, and things are much better between the two. After they bonded at the mall, the fighting stopped. And while he went to work a few days later, she picked up this watch she saw him eyeballing at the mall when they went together. She wrapped it up with fancy wrapping paper and a fancy ribbon to give to him as a gift today.

They're going to Hanna's place for the Christmas party she's throwing. This is more of a little get-together. They're keeping it as just close friends for now— the wild party she's planning is saved for New Year's, where things are definitely going to get crazy. Although, Hanna has to limit herself because she's in a relationship.

Aria curls her hair and puts on a long-sleeved white body-con dress that has lacy sleeves. When she walks downstairs, her boyfriend is stunned by how amazing she looks. Ezra kisses her to greet her.

"Sweetheart, you look gorgeous," he comments, wrapping his arms around her. "I'd like to admire you all day, but we've got a Christmas party to get to."

They arrive at Hanna's for the party. Everyone has now arrived, except Spencer and Toby, who are running a little bit late.

"I can't wait to see what my secret Santa got me!" Hanna exclaims, clapping her hands together.

Just then, there's a knock on the door. Jordan— Hanna's boyfriend— goes to open the door. 

"Jordan, hey!" Toby exclaims, giving the guy a 'bro-hug'. 

"What's up, Cavanaugh?" Jordan laughs. "It's great to see you, Spencer. You look lovely."

"Eyes away from my woman," Toby jokes. 

They enter the house, but there are more people behind them. First comes Caleb Rivers, looking dapper in a white suit and tie, reminding Hanna of when they went to prom together in high school. How he wore his white tuxedo that matched her white dress...

"Caleb?" Hanna chokes, looking up. "I didn't know you were going to be here. I thought you were only coming to the Christmas party."

"Nah, I'm going to be here for the whole holiday season, then I'm flying back to New York," Caleb explains. "It's nice to see you again, Hanna." He pauses and looks over at Jordan, who is standing in front of him. He doesn't look too happy. He recognizes Caleb from the photos Hanna showed him. "So.. you must be Hanna's boyfriend, right?"

Jordan nods his head.

"Yeah, it's Jordan," he responds, offering him a hand to shake. "Nice to meet you, man."

Caleb takes his hand and shakes it, nodding his head awkwardly. He's uncomfortable about meeting Hanna's boyfriend, and he doesn't even know why. It can't be because he isn't over her— they broke up with her, and he had a long time to get over her. Back in New York, he'd been with plenty of women, anyway.

He moves out of the doorway and enters the house. He seats himself down next to Toby on the couch. However, there's still one more guest— one that Aria was not expecting: Jason DiLaurentis. Her eyes follow him carefully when she first sees him. She tries to avoid looking so nervous and startled, but she's pretty sure Spencer has already noticed it.

Jordan's not so uncomfortable anymore since he's greeting a complete stranger, rather than Caleb. He smiles sweetly, shaking the blonde male's hand.

"Hey!" he exclaims. "I'm Jordan— Hanna's boyfriend."

"I know; Spencer told me all about you," Jason smiles. "Oh, I'm her half brother Jason."

Jordan continues to smile sweetly as Jason takes a seat on the couch next to Aria. She tenses up when he sits next to her, as she's able to inhale the intoxicating scent of his cologne. It smells so manly. It's fucking good. Spencer's giving her a deadly look because she can sense how Aria's feeling when Jason's around.

"We want to do our secret Santa swap first!" Hanna exclaims, grabbing the present she bought for the person whose name she drew.

"Fine, let the girls have their fun. The guys can have a chat of our own," Toby smirks. "We'll be talking about you."

"What kind of bromances are these? You didn't even buy each other presents!" Spencer jokes. She pecks Toby's lips before joining the girls, who sit in a circle on the floor with their presents in hand.

Hanna rubs her hands together.

"Alright. Who's going first?" she asks.

"I will," Aria volunteers. "Merry Christmas, Spence."

"Oh, yay! I was hoping you got me," Spencer happily says as she awaits Aria's present.

The much shorter girl reaches over to grab a pretty big box, and hands it to Spencer. She unwraps it carefully, cautious about ensuring that she doesn't harshly rip the wrapping paper or mess the ribbon up too much. She takes the top off the box, and pulls out the dress. A wide smile emerges on her face. Then, she also notices a tinier box in the corner of the larger box, and takes the top off of that one as well. A lovely necklace and a matching pair of earrings is inside. She smiles wider, and leans over to hug Aria.

"This is amazing, and so beautiful," Spencer smiles. "I love it, Ar. Thank you."

"I'm glad you like it," Aria says.

"Okay, Spencer, since you got your gift, you get to give yours next," Hanna tells her.

The girls continue to exchange presents. It ended up being that Aria had Spencer, Spencer had Hanna, Hanna had Alison, Alison had Emily, and Emily had Aria. Aria is ecstatic to find that Emily got her a large set of collector's editions of her favorite classic literature novels, as well as a beautiful winter dress. After the gift swap, she goes to find Ezra to give him his present.

"Sorry I made you hang out with the guys for so long," Aria quietly says as she pulls him over to an empty corner of Hanna's place. She kisses him deeply, cupping his cheeks. 

"No, it was fine. It was great," he smiles. "Hanna's boyfriend Jordan is an interesting guy. He had some stories to tell us about his fashion industry travels. I can see what she sees in him. I think even Caleb was fascinated by him."

Aria raises her eyebrows.

"Don't tell me you're interested in him," Aria jokes, running her hand through Ezra's dark curls.

"Nope, just you. Always you," Ezra grins, and kisses her chastely. 

"Good, because I got you a little something to celebrate the occasion," she tells him. She reaches into her bag and pulls out a small black box and hands it to him. "I saw how much you loved it while we were at the mall, and I had to get it for you. Merry Christmas."

Ezra smiles sincerely at her. Before even opening it, he kisses her.

"God, I love you, Aria," he laughs. "I know I'm going to love it no matter what. It's from you. How could I ever hate anything from you?"

He starts to open the box, and she watches him carefully. His eyes light up when he sees the beautiful Motorola watch inside. He tilts his head and gives her such a sincere look. Their eyes lock, and they both smile at each other at that moment. He cups her cheek with the hand that isn't holding the watch, and looks back down to admire the watch again.

"You really pay attention, don't you?" he chuckles. "I didn't even tell you that I want this watch so badly! I love it so much. Thank you for this." 

"What are you waiting for? Put it on!" Aria encourages.

He nods his head excitedly, and clips the watch on around his wrist. 

"It fits perfectly," she comments, stroking his wrist lovingly.

"It does," he agrees. "I got you something, too, but I didn't know we were doing the gift exchange thing here at the party. Sorry, I'll have to give it to you when we get home."

"No worries. I really just wanted to see your face when you got the present," she smiles.

He smiles back at her, and leans in again. This time when they lock lips, it isn't so chaste anymore. 

Watching from the other side of the room is Jason. He presses a wine glass to his lips, taking a short sip, and eyeing them as they kiss. He tries to avoid gritting his teeth at the sight, but it pisses him off to watch them get so into making out. He fucking hates that she looks so happy with him. And he knows he's also probably going to hell for saying it, but he still wishes their relationship was falling apart. It was a time where Aria wanted to be around him.

But he also knows that what they had clearly didn't mean anything. It was obvious that she would run back to Ezra when their problems resolved, and Jason was aware of that when they hooked up. But he held onto that small piece of hope that things were really falling apart between them, and she was actually looking to move away from being in a relationship with him. But, he knows that's what he gets for having feelings for a girl who's in a relationship. He knew the shit he was signing up for, but he still feels surprised that his heart's broken.

"Jas, don't torture yourself," Spencer says, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"What?" he asks, trying to pretend to be clueless. "I'm just having wine."

"No, you're not. The look in your eye speaks damn well," she tells him.

"And what do you think that look says, Spencer?" Jason asks, turning to face her.

"It says that you're not too happy about seeing Aria and Ezra all mushy and back together," Spencer responds. They both know she's right. "I bet it's hard for you to see them together now."

"You don't even know the half of it..." he mutters bitterly. "What, did she blab all about this to you? I should have known this would happen. She'll run around and tell  _everybody_ except him, right? The one person that really should know about this."

"No, she just told me, I swear," Spencer says. "But you should know that if you have to hope her relationship falls apart for her to be with you, then maybe it isn't so right."

"What are you talking about?" Jason asks.

"I mean that it's never going to be good for you with her if someone tells Ezra, and that's the reason he dumps her. She's not going to stop loving him just like that. And it's going to be hell if she enters a relationship with you while she's still in love with him, or thinks she is. I want you to be happy, but if she keeps playing hard to get with you and going back and forth with you and her boyfriend, then you're never going to be happy. She's my best friend and I love her, but I wish she was aware of she's been doing to you," Spencer explains.

"You mean leading me on? Making me think I have a chance with her when I was really just a distraction from her problems with Ezra? You mean letting me think there's hope for us when she's always going to choose him in the end?" Jason scoffs, taking another sip of his wine right after. "I fucking know. But even after all of that, I still have feelings for her, and it's killing me. I want to stop. Don't you think I know exactly how unhealthy this is for me to be so obsessed with her while she's in a relationship? But every time I think it's over, she gives me another spark of hope that something can happen between us. I'm sick of it, Spence."

Spencer sighs.

"Just know that you deserve to be happy. Don't settle for anyone less than somebody who's all for you unconditionally. You shouldn't have to chase so hard," Spencer reminds. "Good luck, Jas."

He smiles at her weakly, but his eyes can barely leave Aria and Ezra, who are still flirting and kissing in the corner. He shuts his eyes to avoid looking at them any longer.

"Jas, do you want to come hang out with everyone else, rather than watch them?" Spencer asks.

"No, I'm good here," he responds. 

He sits down on the couch alone once Spencer reluctantly walks away to everyone else at the Christmas party. He feels stupid for torturing himself by sitting here and watching them, but he would rather be alone than go try and have a good time, when all he can think about is Aria. That's when he decides he has no purpose for being at the party any longer, and would  _much_ rather be curled up alone in his house, away from this damn party. He gets up off the couch and tries to open the door subtly so he won't disrupt them, but the door makes a creaking sound just loud enough for the both of them to notice. He sighs, but continues to exit the house.

Aria notices him leaving the party, and a knot grows in her stomach. She knows he's probably been in this room the whole time, and is probably upset with her for being so lovey-dovey with Ezra after she led Jason on once again. She runs her hand down Ezra's arm sweetly and bites her lip.

"I should go check on him," Aria says.

"Why?" Ezra asks, furrowing his eyebrows. "If he wants to leave the party, that's his right."

"I know, but he looked upset. The least I can do is see if he's okay," Aria explains.

"Alright," he nods his head. "Wow, my girlfriend is such a sweet woman, isn't she?" He grins and pecks her lips before she goes outside, but honestly, he's still a little confused to why she is so worried about Jason leaving the party.

When she's outside, Jason's on his way towards his car.

"Jason!" she calls, but he just keeps walking. "Jason, wait!"

" _What_ , Aria?" he asks, rolling his eyes as he turns around. "Honestly, what do you want from me? I'm so fucking done."

"Why are you leaving the party so early?" Aria asks. "It's Christmas, you shouldn't go home and be all alone."

"Who says I'll be alone? I'll go invite some slut to my house and get some good-ass company," he scoffs. "And I know you'd care if I did that, so you'd make a fuss to me about it. But then I'd reject every other girl for you, and you'd just run right back to Ezra after. Isn't that how this game of yours works? So yeah, I'm gonna go hook up with a girl, and you have no right to stop me."

Aria presses her lips together. She knows what a bitch she's been in this situation, to both Jason and Ezra. She's been one of those indecisive girls in the love triangles that she's always hated. She never wanted to be  _that_ girl.

"I got you a present," Aria quietly says. "But you're right— you have every right to go do whatever you want with your life, and I'm sorry for playing this stupid game with you. At least let me give you your present before you go. Then, you can go do whatever you want."

"Fine," he agrees, trying to keep a hard face, but his heart is racing at the silly fact that Aria got him a Christmas present.

She smiles at him sweetly, grabs his arm, and walks him over to her car. She opens the back, pulls out a large box, and hands it to Jason. He pulls the wrapping paper off of it, and lifts the top off the box. His eyes light up when he sees what's inside: a Bolder Creek hooded parka jacket, the type he had told Aria is 'so fucking fly' while they were in bed together. He chuckles at the memory, forgetting how much that night has hurt him. 

"Aria, it's.. fantastic," he says, grinning. "It's really, really perfect. I can't even remember the last time I  _got_ a Christmas present. It's perfect. I didn't get you anything, I'm sorry—"

"Don't worry about it. You don't owe me anything," she says. She squeezes his hand. "I'm glad you like it."

"Like it? I  _love_ it," he laughs. "I'm gonna put it on right now!"

He takes off his current jacket, and replaces it with the new one after pulling off the tags. 

"You look very handsome in that jacket, as you always do," Aria compliments.

He tilts his head to the side, smiles back at her, and pulls her in for a long hug. The hug lingers too long for the both of them, and when they're pulling back, the intensity of their gaze is too high to go unnoticed. Both of them begin to lean in, their lips growing closer. But just as their lips are about to touch, Aria takes a step back, which once again frustrates Jason.

"What is it this time?" he asks, folding his arms. "Why would you make it seem like you were going to kiss me if you weren't going to?"

"I didn't _mean to_ ," she tries. "I just— I got so lost in the moment, okay? I'm sorry."

"You keep apologizing, but I'm not understanding the meaning of it anymore," he sighs, shaking his head. "Please tell me what you want from me, Aria. I'm not going to run around and be this guy you're attracted to, but will never leave your boyfriend for. I think I've made it more than clear how I feel for you, so stop. Stop messing with me if this is never really going to happen. I'm not a fucking toy. Is that clear?"

She nods her head weakly, swallowing hard.

"You're never going to make this easy for me, are you?" he says, running a hand through his hair. "Aria, I'm done. I really am this time. It's always going to be you and Ezra in the end, I'm just this side-distraction of yours. So, I'll make it easy on you and get out of your way."

"Jason—" she begins.

"Don't," he warns her. "Don't try and give me some crappy explanation, because nothing you say to me has a meaning. No matter what you say, you always run back to him, and you know it. So I'm going to spare us both anymore trouble and stay away."

 She sighs as she watches Jason get into his car and drive away. Once he's gone, she slams the trunk of her car shut. She tries to cool herself down before going back inside. Ezra's waiting for her in the corner again, and she's definitely not in the mood to keep being all flirty and sweet. 

"Hey there!" he greets, taking her arm and pulling her in for a kiss. She pulls back rather quickly, and stares at the floor. "What happened out there? Why did he want to leave?"

"Nothing serious. He just said it's boring, and there's not much for him to do here," she lies. "Parties like this have never really been his scene, anyway. I get it. I think he mentioned that he's going to go find some girls to flirt with and hook up with, so we know what kinds of parties he's actually into."

"That's so terrible. He'd rather be with some sleazy girls than be with his family and friends on Christmas?" Ezra asks. "That doesn't just show what kind of parties he's into, it also shows what kind of  _guy_ he is."

Aria feels rather defensive of Jason when Ezra says this. She doesn't like the way he's judging Jason.

"How can you say that? You don't even know him," Aria reminds.

"And you do?" he asks, raising his eyebrows.

"No, I didn't say that. I mean, we  _both_ don't know him, so we can't assume he's some sort of bad guy. He's Spencer's brother," she explains.

"Because he's Spencer's brother, that means he's a good guy? I know Spencer's a good person, but that doesn't mean Jason automatically is," Ezra laughs.

"Whatever. It doesn't matter," she says. "Why don't  _we_ stop spending so much time alone here? We do have our friends over there, don't we? We have all the time in the world to be alone after, but it's not all the time that we get to see all of our friends in one place!"

"You mean  _your_ friends," he raises his eyebrows.

"Ezra, they're your friends, too," she tells him.

"Only because of you. If we weren't together, I probably would never speak to Spencer, Emily, or any of the other again," he chuckles. "My real friends are the people  _I_ met on my own. The people that are friends with me because they chose to be, not because it's the best thing to do since I'm dating their friend."

"Oh my God, what does it matter? Fine, for New Year's, call your 'real' friends," she rolls her eyes. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to spend Christmas with  _my_ friends."

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason tries to get over Aria with the help of a new friend. Meanwhile, Ezra's got big plans in his relationship with Aria.

Jason ends up spending Christmas night alone. He's too frustrated with what happened with Aria to even think about sleeping with another woman that night. He goes home, drinks a few glasses of beer, and watches TV. It sucks because he'd gotten so much better at keeping himself sober while he was living in California, but his old drinking habits have started to return now that he's back in Rosewood.

He struggles to take his mind off of Aria the whole day, so he decides to go to Spencer for advice. He drives over to her house and knocks on the door. However, she doesn't answer— Toby does.

"Jason? Hey," he greets.

"Oh. Hi... is Spencer home?" Jason asks, scratching his head. "Everything has been sucking balls lately, so I really was hoping to talk to her."

"No, she's actually at work today," Toby responds.

"Work? It's the day after Christmas," Jason says, raising his eyebrows.

"I know, but.. lawyers. Some new evidence was found in one of her cases, so she really has to deal with it today. It sucks," Toby sighs. 

"Alright. I haven't exactly had a heart-to-heart conversation with Alison in a long time, but—" he begins.

"Why do you want your sisters' perspectives on your problems? They're your sisters, won't they be a little judgy?" Toby laughs. "Maybe it's better to get a guy's perspective. I mean, I'd be happy to hear all about anything you've been dealing with."

A small smile appears on Jason's face. He hasn't done the whole 'socializing with guys' thing in a long time. It's mostly been girls, and not for friendly purposes. His old college buddies that he used to party all night with? They don't keep in touch. As the jobless guy he is, it's hard to go out and make new friends.

"You don't have to do that for me," he says.

"No, I want to," Toby smiles. "Oh, come on! How bad can I be? I've had my fair share of ball-sucking moments." He smacks his own forehead when he says that, and continues, "That probably sounded like something it wasn't supposed to mean, but you know what I mean. I've dealt with a lot of crap. I can take it. And we've got beer— a lot of it, too **.** Spencer's not the biggest fan of drinking, so I drink it sparingly."

This convinces Jason. He nods his head.

"I'm in. Beer and advice? You spoil me, Cavanaugh," Jason chuckles, and walks into the house.

* * *

"We should eat out for lunch!" Ezra exclaims. "The restaurants should be open again."

"Let's go for dinner instead," Aria says, stroking his chest as they lay in bed together. "I'd much rather be here right now,  _and_ we stayed at that party so late that I'm still tired and unprepared to leave this bed."

He sighs, turning his head over. He kisses her gently, cupping both her cheeks.

"It's almost 12, honey," he reminds. "We have to eat at some point."

She sighs and pushes the covers off her body. 

"Where are you going?" Ezra asks.

"To shower. So we can go out to eat lunch," she responds.

He frowns.

"We don't have to go if you don't want to," he says. "Aria, I just want to make you happy. If something I'm doing isn't making you happy, you can tell me that instead of frustratedly agreeing. After all this time we've been together, I thought you'd know that by now."

She folds her arms. All she can think about is how badly she wanted to kiss Jason the night before. She feels like she's stuck. The one thing she's always wanted is to be with Ezra without the drama of sneaking around, without the drama of it not being right, or someone telling them it's wrong. They finally have that. They finally have peace together, but she's now unhappy. She wonders if the reason she was so drawn to him was because of the excitement of the sneaking around and rollercoaster of emotions that would never end. But it's ending. It's settled down. She never thought she'd be  _bored_  while being in a relationship with Ezra Fitz.

It's funny how she has always been so determined that he's her soul mate, and now she's wondering if she was wrong in that judgment. There's nothing wrong with him: he's faithful to her, he's sweet, he's handsome... but he makes her feel  _old_ now. 

"Oh! Shoot!" he cries, running a hand through his hair. "Sweetie, I actually can't even go to lunch today, anyway, so you don't have to worry. I made plans with one of my friends, and it's pretty important. He's a college friend who's only going to be in town today. I can't miss it."

"Alright, I understand," she says, but tries to hide her smile. "It's a guy, right?"

God, she feels like such a bitch for actually being happy that they can't out for lunch together! She's trying to figure out what's wrong with her. How can she be losing interest in such a great guy that loves her so much?

"Yes," he responds with a chuckle. He steps out of bed and approaches her, cupping her cheeks. "But just so you know, even if it were a girl, you would have nothing to worry about." He kisses her briefly, and then pulls back to gaze into her eyes. "You're the only woman I'd even dream about looking at. Never forget that."

Then, the guilt settles in. He's not the only guy she's been thinking about. If he knew that, oh.. how it would kill him. She knows how much it'd hurt him to find out the truth. She could easily get out of this relationship by telling him what she's done, but she doesn't want to hurt him like that. He  _is_ a good guy overall, and it makes her feel horrible that she's been betraying him. 

"I know, I know," she mumbles.

"Do you?" he raises his eyebrows. "You seem to always be forgetting that I'd never do that to you." He falls back on the bed with a sigh and chuckles. "God damn, cheating.. it's ridiculous, isn't it? I don't get how people can even think about cheating on their partner! If you don't want to be with them, then break up with them. It's  _that_ simple. If you have the urge to be making out with a person, you shouldn't stay in a relationship with someone else. Jesus."

Fuck, it feels like he's talking to  _her_. 

"Where is this coming from?" she asks nervously.

"What do you mean? I just think cheating is stupid. I'd never do it," he laughs, and sits up. "I'm not accusing you of cheating, Ar. I know you wouldn't."

"Of course," she says, nodding her head. "Anyways, I should shower now."

"Alright. I'll get dressed and meet with my college friend," Ezra nods his head.

And she feels so fucking guilty as she walks into the bathroom.

* * *

" _Yeah_ , and last night, she was about to kiss me, but then she stepped back. Seriously. It fucking sucks. I don't get why she won't just dump him already," Jason groans, and takes a sip of his beer.

Toby nods his head.

"I feel you, man, but they've got history. They've been on and off since high school. You've gotta understand her viewpoint. It's hard to leave your very first love," Toby explains.

"You feel me? You're in a stable relationship!" Jason cries.

"Trust me, Spencer and I have had our fair share of drama," he chuckles, shaking his head. "After I got back to Rosewood when we were broken up, Spencer was with this other guy, and we had this back and forth crap going on. It would feel like we were getting back together, but then she'd go make amends with her boyfriend."

"But it worked out well. You guys got back together. How did you forgive her for leading you on like that?" Jason asks.

"I got  _really_ fed up with it, of course, but she made it clear she always loved me," Toby smiles to himself. "If Aria can't make it clear that she wants to be with you, then it's never gonna work. Spencer stopped playing with me. She got serious, she broke up with him, and we got back together."

"I don't think Aria and I have the sort of romantic history you and Spencer had. We've never even dated," he sighs. "You had solid ground to go off of. All I have to go off of is a one-night-stand and a few kisses here and there. She's got a shitload of history with Ezra. I can't compete with that."

Toby tilts his head to the side.

"You know, I felt hopeless sometimes when I wasn't with Spencer. I thought she was never going to come back to me, and what took my mind off of it— at least temporarily— is that I tried to start dating again," Toby explains. "I met this girl, she was nice. Her name was Yvonne, but we didn't last. I knew I was still in love with Spencer, I couldn't be with her. It felt wrong to be with her."

"Are you suggesting I try dating someone else?" Jason asks.

"Well, it wouldn't be the worst thing," Toby shrugs. "Honestly, if Spencer kept playing a game with me like that, I would have seriously moved on. It seems like Aria's been doing this to you for way longer. That drama between me and Spencer lasted like a few weeks, and then we were back together."

"I don't know if I can.. date someone else right now," he sighs.

"Stop looking for sex," Toby warns him. "That's why you've never been emotionally attached to girls other than Aria. In her, you're looking for everything. In other girls, all you care about it sex. Isn't that it?"

As odd as it is, Jason knows he's right.

"Yeah," he sighs. "I know, I know. But I think I might be in too deep now."

"Look, if she told you she wants to try and make things work with Ezra, it's clear that she's still trying to figure it out herself. You have every right to be with another girl," Toby tells him. "And I think I might know a girl that's perfect for you. She's this badass carpenter. Very pretty, very funny, and she hangs out with  _all_ the other male carpenters like she's just one of the guys, so she's super cool."

He's intrigued by the description of this girl.

"How do you know she'll even wanna go out with me?" Jason asks.

"I'll convince her. She's single now, and has been for a while. She and her boyfriend broke up like six months ago. When she meets you, I think she'll totally be into you. You're her type," Toby grins.

Jason grins back. He high-fives Toby.

"You know what, Cavanaugh? You're fuckin' boss," Jason chuckles. "Honestly, I never thought you'd be such a cool guy, but it's been great being here. I finally have an actual dude to talk to. Spencer's a great source of advice, but it kinda weird that she's my sister."

Toby chuckles.

"Well, you're welcome. I'm open to talk to whenever," he smiles. "I've missed the bromance thing. Ever since Caleb left Rosewood, it hasn't been the same to me. Besides my carpenter buddies, I haven't had many guys to talk to."

"Yeah, and I've been pretty lonely in the friend department, too. We should do this again some time," Jason smiles. "If only you were single.. we could be each other's wingmen and talk about relationship drama. It sucks that you're in a boring-ass stable relationship with my sister."

Toby shakes his head.

"I wouldn't trade my relationship with her for anything in the world," Toby says.

"Okay, the sappiness has come in, so I better get going," Jason chuckles. "Set me up with that friend of yours."

"Alright, later man. And I will. Just informing you now, she likes to do things as fast as possible, so I wouldn't be surprised if your date ends up being really soon," Toby says.

"The sooner the better. I'd kinda like to have all these crappy feelings out of my system," Jason says.

* * *

"When are you going to tell us why you invited us here  _without_ our daughter, Ezra?" Byron Montgomery demands, raising his eyebrows.

He smiles nervously, scratching his head.

"Sorry, sorry. I've just been waiting for the right moment. This is honestly.. very, very,  _very_ nerve-wracking for me. I've never been in a situation quite like this—" Ezra begins to ramble.

"Get on with it," Byron demands.

Ella sighs, taking a sip of her wine.

"This is a lovely restaurant and all, but I'm also curious to why we're here. You should have brought Aria! I miss seeing her," Ella says.

"I can't.. I couldn't have brought her here. This is something that has to be done without her," Ezra quietly says. He scratches his head again. "Alright, I don't want to intrigue you guys any longer, so I'm just going to spit it out— why I brought you two here." He claps his hands together. "Okay! So, obviously, I love your daughter very, very much. We've been through a lot together, and I love her—"

"You already said that," Byron points out.

"Sorry, I'm just nervous," he mumbles. He shakes it off and continues, "Anyway, I want to spend the rest of my life loving and cherishing Aria Montgomery in every way, but I could never do that without your blessing. I want to inform you both and make sure it's okay with you."

Byron knows exactly what Ezra is talking about, but chooses to continue to play dumb. Honestly, he figured this is what Ezra wanted to ask since he invited both the _divorced_ parents out to lunch without their daughter.

"Make sure what's okay with me?" Byron asks.

"Oh, right.. um, marrying your daughter," Ezra responds, but realizes how casual he makes it sound. "I mean, proposing to your daughter. Proposing to the woman who is the love of my entire life. I need you both to be happy for us."

Byron turns to look at Ella.

"Well, I don't know about him, but for me, I'm happy if Aria is happy," Ella tells him. "You've always treated her right, so I see why she loves you so much. And the nature and beginning of your relationship still bewilders me, but I've grown a lot past it. I would be happy if you proposed to my daughter."

"I can't say I'd be happy..." Byron mutters.

" _Byron_ ," Ella warns.

"Fine, it's been enough time since you two seemed young and stupidly in love. I'm ready to accept your relationship. Clearly, it is something very important to my little girl. If she loves you, then I love you. I would be blessed to have the man that my daughter loves become her husband and my son-in-law, so.. cheers to that," Byron says, raising his wine glass in the air before taking a sip of it.

Ezra smiles to himself. He's finally going to propose to Aria Montgomery.

* * *

Jason is lazily sitting on his couch and eating a bag of potato chips when his phone rings loudly. He groans and reaches over to grab it. He's slightly startled when he sees that Toby is calling him, but figures that it's about his date. He's slightly nervous to find out if this 'great girl' from Toby's carpentry job is willing to go on a date with him, and he's pretty sure he's about to find out right now.

_"Hey, man! Guess what? She just texted me back. She said she's down with going out on a date with you!" Toby informs him. "Her name's Kat, by the way."_

_"Seriously? That's great news!" Jason exclaims._

_"The bad news is.. um, she wants the date to be in 30 minutes at Bucalli's," Toby adds nervously._

_"Wait, what!?" Jason cries. "Dude, 30 minutes?"_

_"I know it's not a lot of time, but you'll have to make use of it. And don't be late. She might go on an angry rant about how you're misogynistic and stood her up to show her that you're the man," he laughs. "Also, don't look like trash."_

_"Is she the type that judges on appearance or something?" Jason asks._

_"No," he responds with a chuckle. "It's just never a good thing to like crap on the first date. And when you get there, look for a girl with very light blonde hair. I called the reservation in for you. It's under DiLaurentis. By the way, she said she would be wearing a red dress. Good luck. Tell me how it goes."_

_Jason laughs as well and says, "Thanks, man. Alright, I will."_

He runs a hand through his hair: 30 minutes to make himself look date-worthy AND drive over to Bucalli's. He jogs upstairs and finds his best suit, which he hasn't worn in forever. He hasn't exactly had a reason to wear a suit this fancy in a long time. Quickly, he changes into the suit and combs his hair as neatly as he can in 5 minutes. Then, he rushes out to get into his car and drive to the restaurant. He doesn't even know what this girl looks like, other than what Toby told him: that she has light blonde hair and is wearing a red dress. He supposes he'll be able to find her when he sees a clueless girl looking for her date as well.

"Hi. DiLaurentis, reservation for 2. My date should be here soon," Jason informs the man at the front.

The man nods his head and leads him over to an empty table for 2. He watches the doorway carefully, waiting for her to arrive. After a few unrecognizable people, he finally sees a girl with light blonde hair and a red dress. It was a very generic description, so he's praying to God that he's calling the right person over. He waves at her. She seems to respond properly, as if she's expecting it, so he assumes he's got the right girl.

"Hey!" he exclaims. "I'm Jason. It's great to meet you. You're even lovelier than Toby gave you credit for."

She smiles and seats herself down at the other end of the table.

"Well, you certainly live up to my expectations," she laughs. "I'm Kat."

He can't stop smiling. This girl is gorgeous. The dress fits her perfectly, and her light blonde hair falls far past her shoulders, medium-length. Toby really set him up well. He's going to owe that guy big time later for this. He's starting to think it won't be so hard to forget about Aria, if this girl just can have a personality that's worth it. She's clearly got the looks, but that's not enough for him if he's going to go for more than just sex. And Toby made it clear that if he wants to get over Aria, he needs a relationship with emotional feelings. He can't have that if he just wants her for her looks.

"So, you're a carpenter. That's pretty damn awesome," Jason comments. "How'd you get into that?"

"I liked building stuff when I was in high school. I joined a ton of woodshed and carpentry clubs," she explains as she picks up a menu. "My dad always told me girls weren't cut out for a job like that, but look at where I am now. I'm better at my job than like all those 'buff guys' at work." She smirks proudly. "I don't mean to come off as a bragger, I'm sorry. As you can tell, I'm a feminist. If you're against that, then leave now. I could never be with somebody who's against feminism."

He laughs.

"I'm educated enough to know that feminism only asks for equality between men and women, nothing more, nothing less. How could I be against that?" he smiles.

"Good. It's a relief to know you're not a misogynist. I'd be out of here already if you said you were," she tells him.

He laughs again.

"No, I don't think it's weird at all that you're into carpentry and building things. I think it's amazing," he says. "Honestly, I wish I had a passion like you. I worked here and there when I lived in California, but I moved back to Rosewood and I'm still trying to find a job I actually like."

"It's pretty great when you get a job doing the one thing you love. Money isn't everything to me, even though it's a pretty bomb-ass thing to have," she laughs.

His grin grows extremely wide when she says that. Fuck, he likes this girl so much already. She's so... bold. He loves it.

"Agreed," he says, his grin growing wider. "So, tell me more about you. How long have you been in Rosewood?"

* * *

 

"Then where do you want to go to eat?" Ezra demands. "We can't keep driving around in circles forever!"

"Honestly, I didn't even want to go out for dinner!" Aria yells.

"Okay, then why the hell are we going? Let's just go home," he grits his teeth.

"Maybe because  _you_ insisted that we go," she rolls her eyes. "Whatever, we're already out, and I'm starving. And now, I'm too pissed to cook, so let's just go to any place."

"Fine. We're going to Bucalli's then," Ezra informs her.

She rolls her eyes again. 

The last thing Ezra wanted to do tonight is fight with her. Everything was supposed to be perfect. He just asked Byron and Ella if they were okay with him marrying Aria, and they agreed, so he was initially extremely excited to take her out to dinner, because he was planning on proposing. But he doesn't want the night he proposed to be the the same night that he and Aria got into a huge fight about where to eat. He decides he'll propose to her in a little while, when things cool down between them again. He wants the night of the proposal to be perfect: no fighting, just constant love. 

They arrive at Bucalli's. Ezra approaches the man at the front.

"Hi, I don't already have a reservation. Can I get a table for 2?" he asks.

"We're a little full right now, the wait time is going to be about 15 minutes," the man informs them. "Can I get a name?"

"Ezra Fitz," he responds.

The man hands him the beeper that will go off when there's a table available.

"Come here as soon as it beeps," the man explains. "Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Sorry for the wait."

"It's no problem," Ezra says, and turns over to Aria. "There's a 15 minute wait."

"Ugh," she groans. "I  _knew_ we should have picked another place!"

"How was I supposed to know there would be a wait time?" he rolls his eyes. "It doesn't matter, it's only 15 minutes. We can wait."

"Maybe you can, but I'm starving," she complains.

"Aria, you can wait 15 damn minutes," Ezra says, rolling his eyes again.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm going to sit down," she informs him, and goes to sit on the waiting bench.

When she turns her head, she's surprised to see Jason sitting at a table with a beautiful blonde woman. She assumes he's going to take her home and screw her, so it probably doesn't mean anything anyway, but she still can't help but feel irritated by the sight. Even though she knows it's her fault for rejecting Jason and choosing to stay with Ezra, she still can't help it. 

"Jason's here," Aria informs Ezra as if it's a miracle.

"So?" he questions, scrolling through his phone. "Restaurants are open to the public, Aria."

"Thanks for being a smart ass," she rolls her eyes. "I just didn't expect to see him here on a date."

"He's a young, single man. Is it so wrong for him to date?" Ezra says. "Why do you care so much? It's his life."

She knows Ezra's never going to understand why she's so surprised to see Jason out on a date. Well, she could tell him and he'd understand, but that would be throwing their relationship in the garbage. He would never forgive her. They're already going straight back to being rocky. They've been fighting a lot again, especially in the car over something as silly as where to eat out!

She watches Jason having the time of his life on the date. The two of them are laughing and giving each other flirty looks the entire time. She feels a knot in her stomach when she realizes what they're going to do when they get home. She remembers when she was the one he did that with.. fuck, he's done this with so many girls. It makes her feel like an insignificant addition to that list of girls he's screwed.

"To be honest with you, I wasn't expecting to like going out with one of Toby's weird friends," Kat laughs. "But, this has actually been really amazing. I loved every minute of this night, Jason."

"I'm glad you said that, because I had a lot of fun tonight— more than I have had in a while. For once, everything isn't so damn complicated in my life. I love it," he smiles.

"The night doesn't have to be over. We can get out of here," she tells him with a slight tone of suggestiveness in her voice.

He bites his lip. He doesn't want this to be about sex.

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea..." he quietly says.

"Oh, are you not one of those guys that gives himself away on the first date?" she jokes.

"Actually, I normally am," he informs her, which surprises her. "But, I don't want this to be like that. All my other 'dates' have resulted in bad endings because of exactly that, so no, I don't want this to be the same. I'm hoping if I try a new method, it won't blow up in my face this time."

"Good to know that I'm special to you," she laughs. "Just because we're not doing anything more tonight, doesn't mean I don't get to do this at the end of the night..."

He gives her a confused look, but she makes it clear for him. She leans over the table and places a soft kiss on his lips. The kiss deepens, and he cups both of her cheeks. They end up kissing for quite a while, which doesn't go unnoticed by Aria, who is still sitting over in the waiting area. She feels uncomfortable watching him kiss another girl.

"Wow," he comments when he pulls back. A huge smile emerges on his face.

"Yeah, wow," she seconds, licking her lips after. "You're making it really hard for me to not want to continue this..."

"We should save ourselves. It'll be worth it in time," he winks.

"I hope so," she raises her eyebrows.

"Come on, don't make me want to do it again.. and go further," he half-jokes, although he  _really_ wants to do more with her. He likes her a lot. While he hasn't forgotten about Aria, obviously— it's way too hard to forget about her just like that— he's getting there. Kat is a fantastic woman, and he's totally into her already. With time, he's confident that he can get over Aria completely. "Let me drive you home."

"Stupid boy, I took my own car here," she rolls her eyes.

"Right..." he shakes his head, feeling like an idiot. "Well, I don't really want it to end. How about we make out in the back of my car?"

"God, this feels like high school all over again!" Kat jokes.

Jason bursts out into laughter.

"Damn, I was thinking the exact same thing!" he exclaims.

"I'm in for making out. But you better stop it before we do something 'too early for the first date'," she reminds.

"Oh, would it be such a bad thing?" he raises his eyebrows.

"You tell me, you're the one who didn't wanna do anything more in the first place," she reminds.

"Let's go find out how much self-control I have," he chuckles and takes her hand.

The two of them start walking away from their table. Finally, he notices Aria, who is sitting in the waiting area. His eyes widen. Fuck, just when he was trying to forget about her and have an  _amazing_ make-out session in the back of his car with Kat.

"Hey, Aria," he greets emotionlessly as he walks out, holding Kat's hand.

She's shocked by how coolly he brushed her off—  _and_ that he's holding this girl's hand! He wouldn't hold the hands of his one-night-stand girls! She's fearing this might be more than that. But then she remembers that it's Jason.. he would flirt in any way possible to end up getting sex at the end of that night, and that includes holding the girl's hand to pretend like he emotionally cares about her. It has to mean nothing to him.

"Who's that?" Kat asks curiously as they enter the parking lot.

"My sister's best friend," he answers. "We're sorta friends, I guess. Not really. She must be on a date with her boyfriend."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During Hanna's New Year's party, Aria is shocked to meet Jason's new girlfriend Kat. However, she is also shocked when she finds something of Ezra's at home.

"Are you sure you even want me to come to this New Year's party of yours?" Kat asks apprehensively. "I mean, I'm a little worried about meeting your friends. I want them to like me and all.. I'm just not sure they're going to."

"Toby already knows you, so you're not alone," Jason grins, kissing down her neck. "Babe, it's gonna be fine, I swear. They're all going to love you! You're  _you_. Damn, I can't believe you're worried right now. You're supposed to be the tough girl."

He chuckles while she runs her hand down his bare chest.

"Shut it," she rolls her eyes. "I know I might come off that way, but there are things I'm scared of.. and meeting your friends is one of those things."

He lays down on his bed and pulls her on top of him. Then, he places a gentle and reassuring kiss on her lips.

"I'm gonna be with you the entire time," he assures her, and then continues kissing her.

* * *

 

"We've seen this movie a million times, but it still never gets old!" Aria exclaims, leaning back on Spencer's chest and giggling. "Man, I always say I hate it, but I really love the Notebook. It's such a classic!"

Spencer laughs and turns the TV off.

"All of you deny loving it, but I know damn well you do!" Spencer exclaims.

After a few seconds, the laughter dies off, and Spencer looks over at her.

"What?" Aria asks.

"I was just.. wondering how things are going with your little.. situation," Spencer confesses. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry, but it does concern me. Jason's really been hurting lately. He was so distraught at the Christmas party the other day. I probably shouldn't even be telling you this. But I have to. I'm worried that you're hurting him."

"Trust me, it's over between us," Aria informs her. "I got caught up in a silly little fling just because things were strained with Ezra. "I think we're both over it. I saw him at dinner like, the day after with another girl. He's already gone back to his old ways of screwing girls for fun. That poor girl was probably expecting a committed relationship, but instead got one night and no calls returned."

Spencer raises her eyebrows. When Jason returned from California, he made it seem like he's no longer that kind of guy. 

"Are you sure it's like that?" Spencer asks. "He seemed  _really_ into you at the party. As if he can't just let you go."

"He's moved on," she responds.

"And you?" Spencer asks. "Have you moved on?"

Aria swallows hard. Has she moved on? She doesn't even know the answer to that. She's been trying so hard to make things feel right with Ezra again, but they just... don't. It feels like they don't make sense anymore, even though she wants it to work out! She and Jason never would have worked out. He's the type of guy that gets caught up with a girl after good sex, but he probably didn't have any intention of a romantic relationship.

"I'm trying," Aria replies. "It's hard. Ezra's been.. weird lately."

"Are you guys still fighting?" Spencer asks with concern.

"Yeah, a lot," she sighs, running a hand through her hair. "And I don't want to fight! I want things to be good between us again. I know he loves me, though."

"Of course he loves you," Spencer nods her head. "He has always loved you, honey. But are you still  _in love_ with him?"

"I don't know," she sighs again. "Whatever, I can't run around trying to fix my love life right now. We should start getting ready for Hanna's party. Ezra's going to be home soon, too. He was meeting with another college friend. He gets annoyed when I take really long to get ready, so we have to start while he's not here."

Spencer raises her eyebrows at this, but nods her head.

"Have you picked a dress to wear?" the brunette asks.

"No, but I did pick this gorgeous pair of earrings to wear!" Aria exclaims. "You have to see them. I totally fell in love with them while I was at the mall. I had it in mind that I would make my debut with these earrings at Hanna's New Year's party."

Spencer laughs as Aria opens the closet and opens a drawer. She searches frantically, but is unable to find it.

"God damn.. where is it!" she cries, rummaging further through the closet. She pulls out two boxes, furrowing her eyebrows at one of them. "This blue box has the earrings.. but I've never seen this red one."

Spencer chuckles while she texts someone on her phone and absentmindedly comments, "It's probably just another unknown piece of jewelry, since you buy so much of it. Better start keeping track of what you buy, Ar..."

"Hmm," Aria mutters, and cracks the box open. Her eyes go wide when she sees what's inside. "Spencer, it's a  _ring_!"

A huge knot grows in her stomach, and she's on the verge of tears. She feels stupid for not seeing it coming, though. She and Ezra have been together for such a long time, so it's no surprise that this came up at some point. But she thought that with all the drama and trouble in their relationship recently, he wouldn't even consider proposing to her. She wonders if that's why he hasn't popped the question yet, even though he already has the ring.

"You bought a ring for the party? I'm pretty sure you have like a billion rings already," Spencer laughs.

"No, I didn't buy this, Spence.  _Ezra_ did, I'm sure of it.." she mumbles.

Spencer puts her phone down and looks over at Aria.

"What? As a present?" she asks.

"No!" Aria cries. "I think it's an engagement ring. I think Ezra has been planning to propose, but hasn't since we've been fighting so much lately."

Spencer's jaw drops.

"Wow.." she mumbles. "Wow, that means you really have to think about what you're doing here. If you fix things with Ezra, he's probably going to end up proposing, you know. You need to figure out if you actually want to stay committed to him. This isn't a joke. This is marriage we're talking about. You can't marry him unless you're going to be devoted to him. It's already a bad thing that you've been with another guy while you're dating. You can't do it again when you're married."

 _When you're married_. The thought of it makes Aria feel queasy. She doesn't know how she's supposed to laugh and have a good time at a party tonight when she knows that Ezra could feel the moment to propose at any time. She doesn't know if she wants this. She has dreamed about marrying him before, and it's always seemed like such a beautiful thing. They would be the star-crossed lovers from when she was younger that ended up together, got married, started a family. Basically lived the picture-perfect lifestyle...

And she wanted that so badly, especially when she was younger. But now? She's not so sure. Especially with everything that's happened with Jason. Is it right to marry him when she's had odd feelings for another man? When she's had sex with that other man? When she's kissed him multiple times? When she's felt weird emotional connections to that other man?

"I know," Aria nearly sobs. She jumps on the bed and goes into Spencer's arms. "I'm so fucked."

"If you want to marry him, there's an easy fix to it. Just look him in the eyes as the ball drops, tell him you love him, and ring in the new year with a passionate kiss," Spencer says.

"And what if I don't want to marry him? What if I'm not sure whether I want to or whether I don't?" Aria asks.

Spencer sighs, thinking about it for a moment.

"Ar, there's no easy way out of this thing. You have to decide, and decide fast. Either you want to marry him, or you don't."

* * *

Aria is too shocked to face Ezra after finding his engagement ring, so she hides it back in the place it was in before, and tells him she's going to the party with Spencer and will meet him there. After getting ready, she and Spencer drive over to Hanna and Jordan's place for the New Year's party.

"Guys, I'm so glad you're here!" Hanna exclaims. "I kept it PG for the Christmas party, but tonight, it's going to get  _wild_. Like, high school wild. Crazy drinking and so many people. Probably people you don't even recognize."

"Then we better stick together," Aria laughs.

"Why? You don't want to indulge in the crazy party life?" Hanna asks.

Spencer raises her eyebrows.

"Han, we're all in relationships right now," Spencer reminds.

"The single life was so much better..." Hanna mutters.

"Are you implying you don't want to be with Jordan anymore?" Aria asks, raising her eyebrows as well.

"No! Jordan is amazing!" Hanna exclaims, but bites her lip. "Never mind, it doesn't matter. I just miss partying a little, that's all. College days were amazing."

Just then, Toby comes from behind Spencer and wraps his arms around her. He kisses the top of her head.

"Hey!" he greets, rubbing his hands up and down her sides. "Thanks for ditching me at home. I had to get here all by myself."

She chuckles.

"Sorry, sweetie," she says, and turns around to face him. "Han, Ar, I'm going to.. you know.. spend some time with him."

Aria laughs and nods her head.

"Knock yourself out, Spence," she says.

Spencer and Toby laugh in unison as they run off to another part of the room to do God-knows-what.

"Couples are gross," Hanna comments.

"Are you hinting something?" Aria asks.

"No," she quickly denies. "But, you're right about sticking together. Let's stick together for the night."

Hanna turns her head for one moment and sees Caleb enter the room. Her eyes nearly bulge out of her head. 

"God damn it..." Hanna mutters.

"What, Han?" Aria asks.

"Caleb's here," Hanna responds, scratching her head. "I totally forgot I said he can come if he wants to."

"You're the one that said it's been forever ago since you two broke up. You're with Jordan now," Aria reminds.

"I know, but that was before I actually saw him in person again!" Hanna cries. "Feelings are so... shitty."

"Oh, trust me, I know," Aria sighs.

"How would you know that?" Hanna groans. "You've been with one guy in a stable relationship for like, ever! And you guys are so in love that it seems like you never would even think about turning your attention away from him. But then there's me. I find such a handsome, sweet, and amazing guy like Jordan, but the minute  _stupid_ Caleb Rivers comes back to town, my crappy feelings get in the way of everything. I should be happy with Jordan! He's given me everything I've ever wanted in a relationship! He treats me like I'm his everything, Aria!"

Aria doesn't know if she should mention how she's not exactly been able to keep her focus on one man, either...

"I've sort of been emotionally cheating on Ezra.." Aria mumbles. "And physically, too..."

Hanna's eyes go wide.

"Aria!" she cries. " _My_ Aria Montgomery! What? Are you serious? You two have never seemed like you would want anything else but each other!"

"Looks can be deceiving," Aria shrugs.

"With who?" Hanna demands. "Who's the guy? Or girl.. I don't judge."

Aria rolls her eyes.

"I don't think I should say. I've been trying to get over him," Aria tells her.

"Oh, and saying his name one more time is going to make you fall back madly in love with him?" Hanna sarcastically says. "You just mean to tell me that you don't trust me enough to tell me who the guy is, even after everything we've been through together. Even after I confessed to you I've been feeling stuff for Caleb while I'm with Jordan! I told you. I can't believe you can't tell me."

"I  _can_. I  _trust_ you, it's just been really hard for me," she sighs. 

 "Oh my god!" Hanna cries, rolling her eyes. "I literally can't believe you're not telling me who it is. I've been with a fair share of weird people in my life. You know I've never been the one to judge, no matter how freaky the stuff gets."

"It's.." she begins, but feels the knot grow in her stomach again. She has wanted to put an end to these feelings. Thinking about him is only bringing those feelings back. And this is the worst time! She's supposed to make herself love the idea of marrying Ezra. "Hanna, it's Jason."

Hanna gives her no expression. It's like she isn't even surprised to hear it.

"That doesn't surprise you at all?" Aria asks.

Hanna shrugs and responds, "Well, we all sorta knew you had a thing with him in high school. The only shocking part is that you went crawling back to him  _now_. Especially when you've had such a long history with Ezra." The blonde smirks a little and jokes, "Damn, Ar, is the sex  _that_ good?"

Aria rolls her eyes.

"This is not about the sex!" Aria denies, shaking her head. "It did start out as something very.. sexual in nature.. but it's not just that."

Hanna gives her a look of disbelief. 

"It's not? You guys bonded and went on a date or something? Good friends? What are his interests, Aria?" Hanna asks.

Aria swallows hard. Oh God. Could she be right? Could this thing she's been so obsessed with really just have always been about sex? She can't give up a long, loving relationship with Ezra because she's been craving to fuck another man! 

But she knows it's more than that. Isn't it? She's believed that she has real feelings for Jason, whether they stemmed from a sexual relationship or not. Before Aria can ask anymore questions, Caleb smoothly slides up behind Hanna.

"Hey, Hanna," he greets. "You wanna get a drink with me?"

She swallows hard and stares at Aria for a moment.

"Go on," Aria encourages. "Sticking together is meaningless. Have your fun, Han."

"I'm sorry," Hanna apologizes. "Ar, if you want to talk more about this later, we can."

"Oh, I never wanted to talk about it to begin with..." Aria mutters as Hanna walks off with Caleb.

* * *

 More and more people start arriving at Hanna's party, but Aria is all by herself. Hanna's with Caleb, when she really should be with Jordan. Spencer's with Toby, of course. And the greatest part: both Jason and Ezra haven't arrived at the party yet. The next time Aria looks up, she sees Ezra entering. He adjusts his tie, and continues walking towards Aria.

"Hey, babe," he greets, and leans down to peck her lips.

She accepts it awkwardly, but continues to sit there and let him speak first.

"Sorry I'm late," he apologizes. "I got stuck in traffic. Maybe if you didn't leave without me..."

Aria rolls her eyes.

"It's fine, Ezra," she tells him.

He sits down next to her.

"You don't seem to be having any fun at all. This is the party  _you_ wanted to go to. You know, with _your_ friends," Ezra reminds.

"Please, stop mocking me all the time!" Aria almost yells. "If things are ever going to work between us, they can't be like this!"  She turns to look at him, and grabs his tie. She feels tears about to come out of her eyes. "What happened to us, Ezra? Why are we like this? Everything between us used to work so well. It was us against the world. Now, it's us against each other, and I'm sick of it."

He presses his lips together.

"I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't mean to.. mock you."

" _Ezra_ ," she says.

"I love you. I'm devoted to you. Is that not enough for you?" he asks, raising his eyebrows.

"Where is this love you're talking about? Because I'm not getting any of it," she snaps, and stands up from her seat.

"Aria!" he cries, standing up as well. "If you don't want us to be like this, then let's not be like this. Let's be good again."

She nods her head, but is still in disbelief. They've had too many of these epic moments where it seems like the problem is fixed. She needs proof that it's actually going to change between them before she can be happy about it. It always seems like things are going to go back to the way they were in these grand moments where they profess their eternal love for each other, like the cheesy couple they've always been. She has no problem being that couple, but only if those words actually mean something, and show up in their actions.

"Okay," she agrees, squeezing his hands. "Okay, let's do it. Let's be us again, Ez."

He smiles at her and pushes a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Let's be us again," he smiles wider, and leans in to kiss her gently.

As she pulls back from the kiss, Hanna's door opens again, and Jason enters. But he's not alone. He's with the  _same_ girl she saw him on a date with the other night. So clearly, this girl is more than one night to him! Fuck.

"What's wrong?" Ezra asks, caressing both of her cheeks.

"Nothing. I was just a little surprised to see Jason here with the same girl he was on a date with the other day," Aria explains.

"So?" he asks, growing slightly suspicious. "What's it to you, Aria?"

She furrows her eyebrows.

"Nothing, it's nothing to me. I just.. I didn't know he could keep a girl. It's sweet," she shrugs.

"Oh, okay," Ezra smiles, and squeezes her hand again. "Do you want me to get you something to drink, honey?"

"Sure," she responds. "See if they have any wine. I don't know how classy Hanna meant for this party to be. It could either be the classiest of wines, or straight booze all the way."

Ezra chuckles and leans in to peck her lips again.

"Alright. Will do, babe," he agrees, and walks to the kitchen.

Once he's gone, her eyes focus on Jason and the girl. They've got their hands all over each other, stealing kisses whenever they can. Fucking hell, they look like an adorable couple! And he looks  _happy_. She knows this is when it's got to end. He's happy with his girlfriend now, and she's so close to a proposal now that she's fixed things with Ezra. They're both going in separate directions, and it would be the most selfish thing ever if she pulled him back into another game of 'maybe I want you, but I'm not sure! I'll just lead you on and push you away continuously'. 

But seeing him with another girl boils her blood. She fucking hates it. She wants him to be happy, of course, but it bothers him that this other girl is able to make him  _this_ happy. She's pretty sure she hasn't even been that happy with Ezra in forever!

"Oh, stop freaking out. You're supposed to be my brave girlfriend," Jason laughs, kissing the top of her head. "Kat, honestly, it's gonna be fine. I swear, they're gonna love you like hell. You're gorgeous, smart, bad ass, funny... I know they'll love you."

Kat smiles at him sincerely.

"You think so?" she asks.

"Obviously!" he chuckles. "I've been repeating it over and over again, babe."

She smiles and pecks his cheek.

"Well, I'm just happy to be here with you, Jason, honestly," Kat tells him, reaching over to take his hand. He gives her hand a light squeeze before they continue walking together. "Hey, I see that girl from our first date! She's all by herself. Why don't we start there and say hi?"

Jason feels tense. She picked to speak to  _Aria_ first? Of course. Just great.

"Yeah, sure. That's a good idea," he agrees, although he's extremely uneasy about it.

The two of them continue walking towards Aria, and she feels uneasy that they're coming to her. She tries to look away, as if she wasn't paying attention to them before. When they arrive, she fakes a smile and pretends like this is the first time she's looked at them since they came to the party.

"Hi," he mumbles uneasily. "You remember Kat from the other day, right?"

"How could I forget?" Aria says, widening her fake smile. "I'm surprised you're still with this one."

Jason's eyes go wide, and Kat's do as well.

"What do you mean?" Kat asks, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Oh, well, you know. He's not exactly the relationship type!" Aria laughs bitterly. She knows what she's doing to his relationship, and it angers Jason. What fucking right does she have to do this? She continues, "I've seen him with a lot of girls, and he usually dumps them after one night."

Jason looks over at Kat and shakes his head.

"That is not true!" he denies. "I don't do that anymore! That was me  _before_ I came back from California. Now, I really want something serious. And I have something serious with you, babe."

Kat rolls her eyes.

"I'm going to get a drink," she announces.

" _Kat_!" he cries, grabbing her arm. "Do you want me to come with you?"

"Fuck no," she rolls her eyes again and continues walking.

Once she's gone, Jason turns to Aria with a furious expression.

"What the hell, Aria?" he demands, folding his arms. "What the hell is your problem? I don't understand why you have to fuck up my new relationship just because you're unhappy with yours!"

"I was only telling her the truth about who you are," she scoffs.

"So, you're lashing out at me because you're jealous that I have a new girlfriend after you continuously rejected me?" Jason snaps. "I literally haven't fucked around with a girl since I got back from California. You're the first girl I pursued, and that was  _not_ for one night. If it was for one night, I could have left it at what we already had, but I kept going. I kept pushing.  _You_ said no. So, I fucking found a new girlfriend. And I really like her, so why do you have to mess this up for me, Aria? Don't you want me to be happy? For once?"

She suddenly feels guilty about what she did. She knows she had no right to mess things up with Kat, but seeing them together just pissed her off so much. 

"Jas... I'm sorry," she sighs.

"You're always sorry, aren't you?" he bitterly says.

"I really am!" she cries. "I don't know what I was doing. Honestly, I was jealous to see that you guys are still together."

"What do you want from me?" he demands. "You don't want to have anything with me, but you also don't want me to be with anyone else?"

"I can't help it!" she confesses. "When I'm with you, something just happens to me. I'm not myself anymore. I shouldn't be like this, but I am. I have a boyfriend, and one who loves me a lot. Don't you think I want my relationship with him to work? But it's not. It literally is not! And I can't get you out of my head.  _That's_ what I've always been sorry about."

"Well, I'm not playing anymore games with you," he shakes his head. "I want to be with Kat. We have something good between us. She's amazing, okay? She really is."

"Jason," Aria breathes out. She stands up and takes his hand. "Come upstairs with me."

"Aria..." he mutters. "What am I supposed to think that means?"

"I think you know what it means," she rolls her eyes.

" _That's_ what you think is a good idea right now?" he asks, taking his hand out of her grasp. "You think that us continuing to have some kind of twisted affair while we're both dating other people is a good idea?"

"Obviously it's not a good idea, but I can't get you out of my head. I  _need_ to do something with you, Jason. I can't stop thinking about you," she confesses, looking at him so sincerely with those hazel eyes he can't refuse. Fucking hell, he's melting when she looks at him like that. "Please, come upstairs. I'll be in there if you want to see me."

He's clearly considering it.

"What about Ezra and Kat? Won't they notice we're gone?" Jason asks. "Not that I'm going, but.. I'm just questioning your logic. I think you're crazy."

She rolls her eyes.

"Don't pretend you don't want it. And they've both found other company. I think they'll be fine," Aria says, scoffing as she walks past him.

He watches her climb the stairs carefully. She opens one of the bedroom doors and quietly goes in there. He licks his lips. Fuck. He has to make a decision. He could go explain things to Kat and make their relationship right again, or he could be the dumb ass he is and fuck around with Aria upstairs. Part of him misses all those moments of insane attraction with Aria. He knows how good he'll feel while he's with her, but how shitty he'll feel when he's leaving with Kat.

And he can't stop himself; he goes straight up the stairs and follows wherever Aria went. Slowly, he twists the knob and creaks the door open. He peers in, and sees that she's already unzipped her dress. His heart begins beating faster and faster. Fuck. He shuts his eyes and enters the bedroom.

"I knew you'd come," Aria says, smiling at him.

"What the hell are you doing to me, Aria?" he sighs, running a hand through his hair. "No other girl has ever made me act this fucking stupid!"

She grabs him by the tie of his shirt and presses her lips against his. She throws her arms around his neck, deepening their kiss. His mouth feels like it's on fire. He feels weak in the knees, like he's about to fall at any moment. There's a burning sensation in his entire body. He's fucking missed the way Aria's lips taste. He's fucking missed the way her entire body tastes. He hasn't had it in so long.

She smirks at him and pushes him on the bed.

"We're not having sex," she tells him. "I just wanted to give you a little something. Celebrate the new year right."

He furrows his eyebrows. No sex? It's a little disappointing, but he'll take whatever she gives. And she gives good: she unbuckles his belt, tosses it to the floor, and practically rips his dress pants off. She pulls his boxers down mid-thigh so his cock is peaking out, and grabs it with one hand.

"Holy shit," he moans, grabbing her hair in the process.

She smirks. She knows how good she's still got him. Kat has nothing on her. Fucking nothing. 

She drops her panties to the floor, and he cannot take his eyes away from her ass. Not even for one moment. Well, that is until she climbs on top of his lap and grazes the tip of his cock against her opening, but doesn't push it in. She holds it in place, and continuously slides his cock against her, sending rushes of excitement through both their bodies.

"Stop teasing! Do it!" Jason cries, letting out several uneasy breaths. He needs her to just go in. He needs to feel himself inside her again.

This time, when he's not so drunk that he doesn't remember every uncensored detail. He wants to remember every little thing he does to her body.

"I said no sex," she laughs, and hops off his lap.

His eyes go wide. He can't believe she teased him like that! But instead, she kneels on the floor. Still holding onto his cock, she pushes it into her mouth instead, sucking on it rough the first time. Although it was far more exciting when her pussy was literally _grazing_ against his cock, the thrill is still high. So high. His hands cling on to her hair and hold it in the shape of a ponytail while she bobs her head up and down, wetting his cock more and more. 

She keeps at it until she can feel him nearing his moment of passion. Once he reaches it, she doesn't even pull her mouth away. She keeps him inside her mouth, and even massages his balls with her hands, sending him even further into his climax. He releases himself into her mouth. He feels completely dizzy and in heaven after finishing off. 

"Holy hell," he mumbles, laying flat against the bed.

When he finally sits back up, he's shocked to see that she hasn't spit what he released out, but instead swallowed it. His eyes go wide, and a grin appears on his face.

"Did you  _swallow_?" he asks.

She laughs proudly, and pulls her panties back up.

"That's so fucking hot," he comments. "Damn, woman." 

He's a little bit saddened that her clothing amount is increasing by the second.

"You're getting dressed?" he asks. "Why? I much preferred the view of your naked ass, you know."

"You're so horny," she rolls her eyes.

"Well, can you blame me? Honestly?" he laughs. "You invited me up to this room, stripped to your lingerie, and tease-fucked me. Then you gave me a blowjob. And swallowed. Am I not supposed to be turned on right now? This is  _Aria Montgomery_ that did all this for me. Of course I think it's hot."

She laughs again, but is now fully dressed. He pulls his underwear and dress pants up, and then loops his belt back on. Before she can even think about leaving, he stands up and presses a kiss to her lips. She obviously kisses back, but not for a long time. She pulls back after a few short seconds, and looks at him with guilt.

"Oh, are we doing this again?" he rolls his eyes. "The part where you remind me that you have a boyfriend, and then run off to him?"

"Well, it's true..." she begins, biting her lip.

"Oh my god," he shakes his head. "You have got to be kidding me! We were completely over until  _you_ asked me to come up here! Why did you ask me to come here if you're going to stay with him? I told you I don't want to play around."

"I miss you, okay? I don't know what to do," she sighs.

"Break up with him if you're not in love with him and have feelings for me. If you don't, then stop messing with me and leading me on. You could have just let me be happy with Kat, you know," he sighs, shaking his head again. 

"Ezra's going to ask me to marry him," Aria confesses, scratching her head.

" _What_?" Jason asks in shock. "How do you know this?"

"I found the engagement ring when I was looking through our stuff," Aria explains.

"Oh," he mumbles, staring at the floor.

"Jas," she says, taking his hand. "What should I do?"

He raises his eyebrows.

"You're asking  _me_?" he says in disbelief. "Aria, you can't ask me to make that kind of a decision for you! I'm not going to be the one that tells you whether you should marry him or not. Obviously, I don't want you to marry another man, but if you're in love with him, then I will not stop you."

He grits his teeth.

"You know what? I'm actually sick of this game," he tells her. "Marry him, Aria. Marry him as soon as fucking possible. Because you know what? You two are so bitchy that you deserve each other. You're meant for each other. You both like to play games with people just so you can run back to your stupid-ass epic love. So do that. Run back to it once and for all. Just leave me out of it. I don't need an invitation to the wedding, but if I must, you can invite Kat, too, because I'm going to fix things with her. I'm done with you. I'm going to be with Kat."

She stands in place as Jason leaves the room. She sighs, knowing how selfish she was once again...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a rather explicit chapter, huh? ;)


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason and Aria both deal with the guilt of their previous actions while easing back into their respective relationships.

"Kat, wait up, please!" Jason begs, following her outside of the house. "Let's talk about what happened, okay? Let's be rational."

She sighs and turns around to face him. The look on her face is so different from when they first started going out, and everything was perfectly fine. She looks at him like he's some womanizing monster. God, he's so fucking pissed at Aria right now. He knows it's his fault for being a dick and further fucking around with Aria upstairs, but he was really ready to start something with her when he did that. He thought that things could be different this time, and that she would say she's actually going to leave Ezra. But no, it was the same old story, and he fell for it.

But of course, he also has lost his chances of a relationship with Kat, because she has become convinced that he's an asshole after Aria gave that unfair speech about the person he  _used_ to be. He knows he doesn't really deserve to be with Kat anymore after what he just did with Aria, but he needs to be. Kat is the first good thing that has happened to him in a while. And when they were together, he actually felt like he was moving on from Aria.

"Rational? You're using me!" she accuses.

"That's not true," he shakes his head. He reaches out and touches her arm gently. "I really, really like you. I was scared when Toby first set us up together because I still felt broken after my last... relationship. But you've been amazing—exactly what I've needed in my life for a long time." He sighs and looks at her so genuinely. "What Aria said about me isn't wrong. That's the guy I used to be. But in the time I spent in California, I changed, and I realized that I want a real relationship. So, I can't change the guy I used to be, but you have to know that I was a lot younger and a lot less mature when I acted that way. I've grown up a lot. Nothing I did applies to how I feel about you."

"And how do I trust that?" Kat asks, furrowing her eyebrows. She seems somewhat moved by what he said, giving him hope that he actually might be able to save this relationship that Aria threw into the fire.

"You'll have to take my word," he says with a sigh. "That may not be enough, but please, try. I wanna be honest with you about everything I can be from now on. Firstly, Aria's not just a friend. Well, she is now, but that's not what she's always been. We had feelings for each other, but the thing between us didn't work out. She's sort of like an ex, but we never officially dated."

"She's practically your _ex_?  Jason, what you're saying is not working in your favor!" she argues.

"I'm not trying to leave things out. I'm trying to be honest with you. Yeah, we had a thing, but that's dead and gone. She has a very serious boyfriend that's going to propose to her. But that doesn't even matter, 'cause I've got a girl that I'm crazy about right now. I want to be with you, so even if she were single, you'd still be the girl I want. She and I are done."

Jason feels like an ass. Maybe he is the ass that Aria described him as to Kat, because he feels like he's lying terribly. He was ready to leave Kat the second that Aria told him that she and Ezra were done. He also left out the detail that he only decided to be "done" with Aria that very night after getting a blowjob from her. So, he knows it's obvious that he doesn't deserve Kat, but he needs to move on, and she's his only hope for that. But he can't tell her that he's not completely over Aria, and he certainly can't tell her that he cheated on her that night  _with_ Aria.

"Please. You make me happier than I've been in a long while. You're what I'm looking for in a relationship, Kat," he says, moving his hand from her arm and touching her hand gently. 

Kat clearly is falling for his words. She gives him a sad look. God, she wants him so badly. She's supposed to be the tough girl that doesn't let her feelings get in the way, and doesn't let a guy control her, but Jason's got her wrapped around his finger for some reason. Although she's unsure if she'll regret it in the future, she gives in, and she steps forward and leans in. A smile forms on Jason's lips, and he leans in as well, closing the distance between their mouths. He presses his hands against her cheeks as they kiss.

When he finally decides to pull back, the smile on his face remains.

"What do you say we get out of this dumb party and go do something fun after the countdown?" he laughs while his grin grows. "And no, it does not have to be sexual in any way whatsoever, 'cause that's not what I want from you."

She smiles back at him, reaching down and taking his hand.

"Yeah, we can go back to my place and watch a movie or something," she tells him. She gives him a jokingly stern look. "Don't you dare try anything on me, DiLaurentis."

Jason chuckles and jokes, "Well, it'll be  _very_ difficult for me, but I'll get through it."

"Let's get back inside and get this countdown over with so we can have our quality time," Kat smiles.

* * *

"You were gone for so long. I missed you already."

Aria bites her lip when she hears Ezra say this. She takes a few steps forward, and lets him kiss her chastely and briefly. He wraps his arms around her, pulling him close so she's pressed against his body. She rests her head on his chest, trying to relax herself and enjoy his company, but she's tense. She can't shut her eyes and enjoy the moment. She keeps thinking about how pissed Jason probably is at her, and how much she's already fucked up her relationship with Ezra. If Ezra were to find out about all the terrible things that she's done in their relationship, he would never forgive her. And that engagement ring would never be on her finger, not that she even knows if she's sure that she wants to marry him yet.

"I missed you, too," she says, looking up at him. She tries to look at him as sincerely as possible, but even if she wants to revert their relationship to the good days, it's too late. What she's done is unforgivable, even for a couple with a history as tumultuous as theirs. This is something that she's not sure Ezra would ever be able to get over.

"I'm not that ecstatic about this party, but I want to be here if you do. But you don't seem to be that interested in being here. Do you want to head home?" he asks, putting his hand on the back of her neck, stroking it lovingly.

"Hanna put so much effort into planning this New Year's party, and we haven't even watched the countdown. Don't you want to stay here and spend time with friends while we go into the New Year?" she says.

"Of course. Whatever you want. But don't do this for Hanna. If you want to leave, we can," he informs her.

"It sounds like  _you_ want to leave," she says, raising her eyebrows.

He furrows his eyebrows at the accusing tone of her comment.

"Relax, Aria," he tells her, confused by how riled up she is. "Just relax. I don't understand why you're so tense right now. I'm not trying to make us leave the party. I just want you to do what you want to. Let's not fight anymore tonight. Remember what we promised?"

"Yeah, I do," she nods her head. "I'm sorry, babe. I didn't mean to. Everything has just been so stressful lately."

"Hey, I totally understand," he smiles at her. She can see how hard he's trying to change and be an understanding and attentive boyfriend again. It breaks her hard how good he's being to her now. "From now on, I want to be the man I should have been long ago. I want to be the man that you deserve. I'm never going to hurt you the way I did again. You are the love of my life, Aria. We've been through so much together."

God, she feels like he's proposing already. He wouldn't do that at Hanna's New Year's party, would he? It's not the right timing for something like this. Hell, she hasn't even decided if she wants to marry him yet!

"That's so sweet," she smiles, pushing herself tighter against his chest. "I love you, Ezra." She snuggles up against him, trying her hardest to smile. "Why don't we go and get comfortable on the couch? I think they're playing the ball drop on the TV in the living room. There's only a few minutes until the new year."

"Sure," he agrees, reaching over to take her hand.

They sit down on the couch in the living room, ignoring the wild hordes of people around them, many of which are completely indulging in alcohol. Aria eases into his arms, laying her head on her chest. God, this isn't so bad, right? He's a good guy who loves her a lot, and she does love him back. They've been through so much that it's not worth throwing away because she's attracted to some other guy, who she most likely only has a sexual connection with. She's got the love of a good man who wants to marry her.

He kisses the top of her head lovingly and snakes his hands around her stomach, holding her against his body tightly. They stay cuddled up that way for a good amount of time before they hear the excited people around them announcing the nearing countdown, aided by the TV blaring the news. Ezra smiles and looks over at her, gesturing for them to get off of the couch using his head. Aria nods her head in agreement and stands up, offering him a hand to get up as well.

"Are you ready to start off the new year right?" he grins, placing his hands on her waist.

"I am," she nods her head. "We're gonna do it right this time, Ez, and I mean it. Forget all the mistakes we've made in our relationship. New year, new us."

"You've got that right," he says in agreement. "And we can ring in the new year correctly, too."

She knows exactly what that means—a classic New Year's kiss, right as midnight hits. She throws her arms around his neck, preparing for the countdown to begin. And it does: _10...9...8...7..._ she glances at her boyfriend, ready to get their relationship right now. She's definitely screwed up by having this fling with Jason, but he's done with her now, and that's a clear sign she should be with Ezra, right? Jason can't handle her drama, but Ezra can. He always has been able to. He's dealt with her craziness since high school. Hell, he put up with her as they had to date secretly while he was still a teacher. 

 _6...5...4..._  

Jason begins walking into the living room, alongside Kat, who is extremely happy that things are working out with him again. She's thanking herself for taking a risk and trusting Jason. She believes that he's become a good guy. He certainly seems like he is.

Aria quickly glances over at him. She feels herself growing uneasy at the sight of Jason and Kat together. She sees the smile on Jason's face while Kat rests her hand on his chest. They seem so happy together. Quickly, Aria turns her attention back to Ezra. She touches the back of his neck sweetly, playing with the small amount of hair. 

_3...2..._

Jason  _was_ ready to ring in the new year by kissing Kat. He was ready to give his all to his relationship with her. He knows he should be done with Aria after all the games and crap that she's put him through. He thought he would be okay with sharing Aria secretly while she continues dating Ezra, but he's figured himself out—that's not the life for him...not anymore. He wants a long-term girlfriend. He wants something real. And he's supposed to have that with Kat now. But of course, he can't help but feel  _angry_ when he sees Aria and Ezra looking at each other so lovingly in Hanna's living room, especially considering the new information that he's received about Ezra planning on proposing to her.

_1._

_"Happy New Year!"_

Jason is staring right at Aria and Ezra at that moment. Midnight has just been reached, and they're in a passionate liplock. Her arms are thrown around his neck, and his hands are placed firmly on her waist. He snaps his head away, realizing how pissed he's probably just made his actual girlfriend. He swallows hard, and smashes his lips against Kat's in an attempt to not even see the disgust that was probably on her face when she saw him staring intently at his ex-girlfriend's New Year liplock.

He kisses Kat as passionately as he can, even going to the extent of slipping his tongue into her mouth. God, he needs her to forget what he just saw, or everything he said outside is going to turn into a waste. She'll think everything he said is complete bullshit. 

"... _Jason_ ," she says, using all her willpower to pull back from their intense kiss.

"Yeah?" he asks, trying to sound nonchalant.

She furrows her eyebrows. She's not sure what to make of what she just saw. Why did her own boyfriend not kiss her right when it reached midnight? And more importantly, why the hell was he watching his ex-girlfriend lock lips with someone else? 

"I told you that we were gonna ditch right when the countdown ended, and it did," he says, breaking the silence. "So, let's do it... let's get the hell out of here. Was it your place or mine?"

"Mine..." she responds, furrowing her eyebrows even further. 

She supposes they're not going to talk about what she just saw, and she agrees—she  _wants_ to ignore it. She wants it to be nothing, and act like it never happened. Because, God, she really likes this guy, and after everything he said outside, she wants it to work out with him so badly. She can't let this tiny slip-up end their entire relationship, right? 

Right. So, she lets it slide. She lets Jason take her hand and lead her outside of Hanna's house. They get into the car, and he drives over to her house. They sit there and talk like nothing's wrong, and like nothing is different.

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat begins to have serious doubts about her relationship with Jason after the events of Hanna's New Year's party. Meanwhile, Aria and Ezra blissfully resume their relationship with new promises and goals for the new year... until she begins to have second thoughts after she talks to her friends.

He runs his hand up her leg, slowing down as he reaches her thigh. She giggles into their kiss, putting her hand on the back of his neck. Slowly, she moves her hand from the back of his neck and into the dark curls of his hair, disheveling them far more than they already are. It takes a lot of willpower, but he finally forces himself to pull back, which prompts her to let out a groan. She falls onto her back and sighs.

"Hey, hey—" he begins, trying to console her. He leans down so he's hovering above her, and gives her an apologetic look. "I'm sorry I have to cut this one short, but babe, we've iced out  _everyone_ and  _everything_ for the past week since the New Year's party." He sighs and puts one of his hands on her cheek. "Look, I  _love_ spending time with you again. It feels so good to be reunited and better than ever, but we can't go on like this forever. I've taken too many vacation days from work. Winter break ended for the kids at school a few days ago."

"Take a few more!" she laughs, putting her hand back on his neck and trying to pull him back down and close to her. "God, I've missed being so close to you, Ez. I don't want to go back to the way things used to be."

"They won't," he shakes his head. "Sweetheart, I promised you that it'll never be that way again, and I meant it. I'm all in from here on out."

She sighs, wrapping her legs around his hips.

"I just got you back. I don't want to give you away already," she whines, pushing her hands back into the curls of his hair. "We've been having so much fun together."

"I know, I know...and I understand what you mean," he nods his head. "But we can't go on like this, Ar. I mean, come on! You've completely cut all of your friends off. How are they going to discuss the latest drama of their lives? When was the last time you even called one of them since we went AWOL?"

She sighs again, understanding what he's talking about. But she's too stubborn to give in. She's been enjoying her time hiding away at their place, having nonstop sex, talking, and acting like the couple she's wanted them to be for a long time.

"They've got each other to discuss their drama, not that they should have much, considering the fact that they're all in very stable relationships at the moment," Aria explains. 

"Aria, babe... just call them, okay?" he says, pulling her up so she's sitting up and cupping her cheeks immediately. "They need their friend to talk to. Your friends have probably been missing your presence very much, and I don't want to be the one that's robbed them of you." He chuckles and tilts his head to the side. "It doesn't mean that I love you any less... because I love you a lot, and you should know that damn well by now."

"I do," she smiles.

"Good," he smiles back. "So, call them. Have a cup of coffee. Spend some time with them! And you better call your boss and tell him that you're going to be back at work as soon as possible. We can't put our lives on hold forever."

"You're right," she groans.

"Of course I am," he chuckles. "I'm going to call the school office and tell them that I'm going to be back at work tomorrow."

" _Tomorrow_?" she asks, raising her eyebrows in surprise. "Ezra, that's so soon!"

He chuckles again.

"Considering how long we've been hiding out? No, it's not," he shakes his head. "Just because I'm back at work, doesn't mean we're going to go back to the way our relationship was before we fixed our problems. I'm going to try and avoid going out to late-night meetings. And I promise, I'm going to attend to our relationship as much as possible. I'm going to give us all the attention we need to keep this up, even when we start working again."

"I'm holding you accountable to what you just said, sir," she sighs, relaxing against the pillow again. She nods her head, beginning to agree with everything. "I should probably call Hanna. She actually  _was_ having a relationship crisis, so I should've been there for her. And I'm sure Spencer and Toby have been making a lot of sweet love," she scoffs as she speaks. "You know, they like...never fight anymore. It's really weird...but I should still call her. Hopefully I'm not disrupting  _her_ sexy times."

"Once they pushed past their differences, it probably got a lot better," he shrugs his shoulders. "Don't worry. We're not going to fight like before ever again." He chuckles afterwards. "And I'm also sure that Spencer is going to be happy to put her sexy times on hold to talk to her best friend for a bit. Don't worry." 

He pats her back gently as he gets up from the bed. She sighs as she watches him put his shirt back on and walk out of their bedroom. Aria picks her phone up from the nightstand and calls Hanna up first.

_"Hey, Han... it's Aria."_

_"You think I don't know? I've got caller ID."_ She hears a faint laugh coming from Hanna's end.  _"Sooo... you! You've been AWOL recently. I mean, I know I saw you cuddling up to Fitzy the night of my party, but I can't help but think about everything you said about your sexy affair with Jason. Can I assume that you've been boning him since?"_

Aria sighs. She hushes her voice as she responds,  _"I can't talk about that right now! Ezra's in the other room, and he could come back at any minute. And for the record, I've been with Ezra ever since. What I had with Jason has got to be over by now. He's got a girlfriend, and I've got a boyfriend. I was thinking about what you said the other night, too... you asked me how much I really know about him, and it's true. We worked together well when it came to sex, but who knows how it would be if we actually dated? I've obviously got my head in my ass if I think that I have some epic love with him. That's what I have with Ezra, and I'm not going to screw it up for sex."_

 _"Whoa... I wasn't expecting you to listen to me, Ar... I don't want to be the one who talked you out of going for what you want."_ She sighs as well.  _"Look, if you've got feelings for Jason, then go for it."_

_"It doesn't matter what we had, because I've made my decision: I want to fight for my relationship. And it's pretty clear that Jason doesn't want me in his life now, anyway. Whatever, I'm not here to talk about me. I wanted to talk about you."_

_"About me? There's nothing to talk about."_

_"Hello? How you confessed you're still feeling things for a certain brown-haired hacker boy?"_

She hears a loud groan coming from Hanna.

_"What I said about Caleb...I know, I know... I don't think it's right."_

_"What do you mean? Because you don't want to deal with the drama, or because you've realized that it's not even true?"_

_"Maybe it was true back then, I don't know. But Jordan left for a big meeting in New York a few days ago. The night before he left, he held me in his arms, told me how beautiful I am, and he looked at me like I'm his world. God, Aria... he's my literal Prince Charming. And I know it's a cliché...but that's how I feel. I do love him."_

_"So, you wouldn't leave him to rekindle your high school love?"_

_"Look... I know what you have with Ezra is huge, but what I had with Caleb was, too. He was my high school sweetheart, as disgusting as that sounds. But whatever, disregard that! Sometimes, we have to move on from high school. I let myself fall in love again after we broke up, and I'm happy I did. I could have called Caleb up, held onto the past and tried to make that work forever, but there's a certain point where you have to let your first love go. What if I had been hung up on him for life? We could have made each other miserable for years to come! But we didn't because we broke up, and I gave myself the opportunity to meet new people and move on."_

_"I did, too... Ezra and I broke up for a long time before we got back together. I slept around with a ton of guys."_

_"Yeah, you slept around. That's different than looking for somebody to start a life with. I'm betting you were just hooking up with guys to take your mind off of Ezra. The moment he came back, you jumped back into his arms because you were still hung up on what you guys had while you were in high school."_

_"Sometimes your first love is your true love. I mean, look at Spencer and Toby! They're happy together. And Alison and Emily? They had so many issues, but they worked through it and are happy together now."_

_"I don't know. Everybody's different, Aria. But I think I know what I want. I don't look at Caleb the same way I look at Jordan, and that's enough for me to know that I love him. And I'll always love Caleb... there's always going to be a special place in my heart for him. He was the first guy I ever really opened up to and fell in love with, but that doesn't mean he's the only guy I could ever love."_

_"Hanna... I should go."_

_"Why? Too much thought for you?"_

_"This is overwhelming."_

_"Well, you know that Ezra wants to propose to you! So, think about what you want in life. Do you want to spend the rest of your life with Ezra? Or do you think that you could have something with Jason?"_

_"I don't even know him that well!"_

_"Get to know him."_

_"He hates my guts now, and he has his own girlfriend."_

_"Goddamn, I hate myself for influencing you, but it's so hard—I just, I feel like I really learned something from everything that went down with Jordan and Caleb! Or, everything that didn't go down because I realized what I want."_

_"Yeah, I wish I could have an epiphany. I need it badly."_

_"Well, I'll let you be. I should probably call Jordan and check up on how he's doing in New York."_

_"Alright. Bye, Han... and, thank you for trying to help me sort everything out—"_

_"Don't even mention it. Try not to fall off the face of the earth again."_

_"I won't... hopefully. Love you."_

_"You, too."_

Aria sighs. She looks over at the photo frame that rests on the nightstand as well. It's a picture of she and Ezra when they were much younger. God, the smiles on their faces... she's so goddamn conflicted that she hates it. But she doesn't really have a choice at this point. Jason doesn't want her anymore.

* * *

 

"Hey, babe!"

"Jason! Hi."

Jason smiles at his girlfriend before leaning in and pecking her lips quickly.

"I thought I'd drop by. I was just talkin' to Toby for a bit, and thought I'd come by and see my girl."

"That's so thoughtful," Kat smiles. She reaches over and takes his hand and squeezes it. "Come inside. I'm glad you dropped by. I've been missing you terribly all morning."

"Oh, is that so?" he chuckles and then leans in to kiss her more passionately this time. His hands fly straight to her ass, squeezing it roughly. "Goddamn, you look so good, as usual," he comments as he pulls back. "Like, fuck... what the hell did I do to deserve a girl like you?"

"Shut up," she rolls her eyes. "Do you want something to eat?"

"Nah, I ate at Toby's," he answers.

"I see you two have been getting pretty close lately," she teases.

"Yeah, maybe," he chuckles quietly. "I was having a sucky time with girls a while back, so I went to see Spencer, but she wasn't home... but Toby was. And we talked for a bit. That's when he told me he could set me up with you. But disregarding that, he's actually really cool. I realized we've got a lot in common. So, we drink beer every now and then and talk. I guess I always stayed away because he's my sister's boyfriend, so I thought he would be lame."

Kat tries to focus on everything he's saying, but all she can think about is the girl problems. She told herself that she wouldn't pry, but—

"Girl problems, huh?" she pokes, trying to sound nonchalant and teasing.

"Yeah, it's nothing now," he shrugs it off. "Hell, I'm glad I had girl problems. I met the best girl through it all."

She can't stop thinking about how he stared at Aria Montgomery during the New Year's party at midnight. While he was supposed to be ringing in the new year by kissing her, he was staring at his ex-girlfriend kissing her current boyfriend! Kat has wanted to avoid it, but she can't. It's bothering her, as much as she's tried to move forward in her relationship with Jason normally.

"We never talk about our exes much," Kat points out. "Come on, Jas... I wanna get to you know you better."

"Exes are in the past, that's why," he says, walking towards her couch and seating himself down.

"I know they're in the past. That's why we should talk about it... all of the heartbreaks we've been through. We can laugh about the crazy exes, and just get to know each other so much better through it," she explains, and follows him to the couch. She sits down next to him, and puts her hand on his chest. "Come on!"

He groans.

"I told you that my past is not who I am anymore. I wanna focus on the present, and what I have with you... right now," he grins, putting his hand on her cheek. He leans in and kisses her slowly.

After pulling back, she tilts her head to the side.

"Well, who you were is a part of who you are now," she folds her arms. "I'm okay with who you used to be, okay? I want to know you—all of you. Not just the Jason you've been since you got back to Rosewood."

"Fine," he reluctantly agrees. "You wanna talk about our exes? Let's talk. What do you want?"

"Let's start from the beginning! Your first girlfriend. Tell me about her," Kat grins.

He sighs, thinking back to the beginning of high school.

"Her name was Savannah James. She was this cute blonde girl in ninth grade... we had some class together, and I thought she was really attractive," he explains. "I asked her to a school dance, and we ended up making out by the end of it. I think we dated for like... a month. I can't even remember why we broke up, it was so long ago."

"Well, my first boyfriend was this guy named Ralph. It was in seventh grade. We'd text each other long paragraphs where we professed our love for each other," Kat laughs at the memory.

"So, are we done with this game?" Jason asks, raising his eyebrows.

"Hell no! We only talked about first girlfriends slash boyfriends," she furrows her eyebrows. "You don't like this? I thought it was fun hearing about our embarrassing old relationships, especially from high school and middle school."

 "It's not," he objects quickly, running a hand through his hair. "Look, Kat, I like you a lot, but this game just isn't for me. It makes me think a lot about the guy I used to be, and I don't wanna think about that, okay? I wanna move forward. I'm trying to be a better person, and you know that."

She knows there's more to how defensive he is, but she also knows that if she pushes too hard, he's going to get pissed off. So she nods her head, trying to make i, l seem as if she understands what he's saying perfectly. She lets her hand rest on his chest, and pecks his cheek quickly.

* * *

" _Aria_... what are you doing here?"

Aria raises her eyebrows at her friend, who is unusually startled to see her. She's clothed in a thin robe, poorly hiding the lingerie underneath. Aria can see bits of it peaking out. 

"You've been ignoring my calls and texts for like a week, so I...I didn't think you'd be stopping by any time soon—"

"Yeah, I decided it'd be better to just come see you in person," Aria says, biting her lip. "I'm sorry about all the ignoring. I was having my own little crisis, which hasn't exactly been solved yet—"

She's about to continue speaking, but a shirtless Toby Cavanaugh begins to emerge from the other room cluelessly.

" _Spence_ , hurry up, I'm getting lonely," he laughs. He then sees Aria in the doorway, and embarrassingly attempts to cover his chest. " _Aria_! Hey! What's up? I didn't know you were here!"

Aria laughs under her breath, shaking her head.

"I didn't mean to interrupt," she tells them. "I'm sorry for barging in."

"No, you didn't really interrupt. Jason just left a little while ago, so we've been occupied until then... well, at least  _Toby_ has been," Spencer explains. Aria finds herself growing uncomfortable at the mention of Jason. "I still find it very weird that  _my_ brother comes over to see Toby instead of me."

"Well, there's nothing stronger than the power of a bromance, am I right?" he jokes.

"Go away!" Spencer scolds playfully, rolling her eyes. "God, Toby, that was the most cringeworthy thing I've ever heard you say in my entire life."

"Sorry. It was a joke," he chuckles, approaching the doorway. He finally reaches Spencer, putting his hand on her cheek. "Forgive me?"

"Maybe," she teases, but won't stop staring at him.

"... _Okay_ , I see that you are a very busy woman," Aria laughs, shaking her head. "I can come back another time."

"No, Ar, don't go!" Spencer stops her, releasing herself from Toby's hold. "I'm all ears for your crisis." She looks over at Toby, "We're going to have to reschedule. Go find something else to do."

"Fine," he reluctantly agrees. "But you better make it up to me soon, Hastings."

"Oh, I will," she says with a suggestive smirk on her face as Toby walks back into the other room.

"You guys are gross," Aria rolls her eyes. "Cute, but gross at the same time. Not that I should be talking, since I have screwed my love life up irreversibly. I would kill to have something so calm like you two do again."

Spencer laughs quietly, shaking her head.

"Trust me, we've had our fair share of ups and downs in the past," Spencer explains. "No relationship is perfect."

Aria gets that. She knows her relationship with Ezra isn't the perfect fantasy that she wished it were, but there's love between them. They're far from perfect, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't love him. She's just not sure if that's the kind of rest-of-her-life love that Hanna has with Jordan, or the high school sweetheart love that Hanna has with Caleb. 

"Well, do you have at least a minute to talk about things?" Aria asks.

"Of course. I told you that I'm all yours! Talk away," Spencer nods her head.

The two of them sit down together on the porch of Spencer's house after Spencer shuts the door.

"I kinda explained my situation to Hanna, and she gave me some surprisingly applicable advice... but it's kinda just confused me on where I stand even more," Aria explains.

"Confused you about what? What to do with your two lovers? One of them being my brother..." Spencer laughs.

Aria rolls her eyes playfully.

"I really don't know what to do. I love Ezra, and I'll always love him. But he's going to propose to me, and I'm really not sure if I can commit to spend the rest of my life with him," Aria tells her. "I'm not saying I don't want to marry him, either. I'm just so lost... and confused. God, I wish my stupid head could just sort everything out and tell me exactly how I feel!"

"Don't you know what you want? At least a little?" Spencer asks, raising her eyebrows. "You've got to have some type of gut feeling..."

"I'm serious, I have no idea what to do. With Ezra, it's permanent, safe, loving... we have a hell of a lot of problems, but I know he wants to fix them. And his way of fixing everything is proposing. He wants to spend the rest of his life with me, Spence!" Aria cries. "And then there's Jason. We have this  _connection_ , and I can't really explain it, but it's there. It's a risk. It's not safe. It's something totally new. And not to mention, it's even more screwed up because he's got a new girlfriend now."

"Aria, you can't be so back-and-forth with them. Hell, you shouldn't even be marrying Ezra after everything you've done behind his back," Spencer reminds. "Jason doesn't want to be screwed over by you again, but you already hurt him for the second time. Trust me, he fell hard for you all over again, and you just hurt him the same way you did last time. He didn't deserve that."

"I know he didn't..." Aria sighs. "Both of them deserve so much better than this, but I can't help it! They're both amazing guys, okay? How am I supposed to choose between them?"

"Well, you have to. I know it's tough, but you have to do it. And if Jason's the one you want to be with, then you've got to be willing to fight for him, too. From what I've heard, things with Kat are going really strong right now," Spencer informs her. "But that doesn't mean it's an easy ride with Ezra. Sure, he's planning on proposing, but you two really do have a ton of things to work through before you're into a perfect, domestic life."

Aria stares at the gray road in front of her. She's never liked making decisions, so she definitely hates the situation she's in right now. 

"Aria, you can't go on like this forever," Spencer tells her. "I love you, but you just can't keep hurting yourself and both of them. It's not good for any of you, really."

She turns and looks at Spencer. 

"Tell me how it would feel if you picked Ezra," Spencer says. "Pretend he's the one you've chosen. Do you feel a knot in your stomach? Or are you satisfied with your decision?"

She feels the knot. It's there. She thinks about how she'll go on, accept Ezra's proposal, and wind herself into a lifetime of something she's grown out of. She dwells on the lackluster kisses they share... the passion between their lips that's been missing for a long time now. In the back of her mind, Jason is there. And she'll forever wonder what could've been if she had picked Jason at this very moment. Would she have ended up being happier? Because the future version of herself in her mind doesn't seem happy at all.

Aria's mouth is hanging open. She keeps thinking about Jason. She wants that with him... she wants to know what it would be like to be with him. There's so much passion between them. She has no idea what they'd be like in a real relationship, but she wants to find out. He was ready to drop everything and father their child when he thought she was pregnant. And  _God_ , they weren't even in a relationship! She knows that Spencer is right. Jason cares about her so much. She's just worried that she fucked it up by going back-and-forth with him. He was so done with her games. How is she supposed to fight Kat for him when he clearly wants her? Being with Jason isn't going to be easy, and she doesn't even know if she's ever going to get there.

"Spencer... I think I know exactly what I want now."

Spencer tilts her head to the side.

"Really? I didn't think that was going to work or help at all, to be honest."

"Well, it did. I have to go take care of something."

* * *

 

She does it. She drives over there, ready to do what she just realized that she wants to do. She parks her car, and starts walking towards his door. The lights are clearly on inside. He's home right now. She rings the doorbell, feeling her palms sweating. She's nervous. _Really_ nervous, in fact. She has no idea how this is going to end up going. She wants it to work out. She wants to feel at ease again.

He opens the door. He's startled.

"Aria."

"Hi, Jason..." she bites her lip.

"What are you doing here?" he asks, furrowing his eyebrows.

She doesn't know if he's mad to see her, or just really shocked. It looks like a mix of both. She's betting he hasn't really wanted to see her since he declared that he's done with her and her games.

"I think that we should talk," she says.

"Talk about what?" he demands. "There's really nothing to talk about. I told you what I meant."

"Please, won't you just listen to me?" she asks.

He scoffs.

"Listen to you? Like you listened to me when I made it clear how I feel about you on numerous occasions? When I put myself out there and you kept messing with me? I told you that I don't want to play your twisted game anymore, and I wasn't fucking lying when I said it, Aria," he shakes his head. "You're so fucking entitled, you know that? You think you can go all over the place with me... push me around however the hell you want, and then just come back and pout at me to make everything better again. I may have fell for it the past few times, but not anymore. I'm making it clear again: I'm not being a pawn in your game. I have a girlfriend. I really like her, too."

"Jason, please... I was so confused about how I felt, and how I'm supposed to deal with the situation that I'm in, but I promise, that's not what it's like anymore. I don't want to play anymore games. I've figured out exactly what I want, and how I want to do this," she tells him. 

He doesn't fight her again. He just raises his eyebrows, looking at her with a lot of intrigue.

"Jason, I want to be with you," she confesses, and his eyes go wide. "I know that's hard to believe after everything I've done, but I sat long and hard, and I thought about it. I figured it out. That's what I want. I was going to go home, and I was going to tell Ezra that it's over. I want to end things with him, even if it's going to be hard. Because it's worth it... to be with you. We have a connection, and I know you can't deny it either. So just... please tell me you want to be with me, and that you're willing to give me another chance?"

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason is unsure of what to do after hearing Aria's confession. Meanwhile, Aria is anxious as she awaits Jason's response, but is thrown off when Ezra throws a sudden curveball at her.

Her heart is pounding heavily as she drives home on that cold night in Rosewood. She just left Jason's place after putting herself out there and basically begging him for another chance. And she thought that maybe—just  _maybe_ —everything would turn out to be like a miracle, that he would tell her that she's the one he wants to be with, and that he's willing to give her another shot to make things right. But her thoughts that it could "maybe" go that way were twisted. He literally gave her a  _maybe_.

And she's not denying that she deserves it after the hell she put him through. She deserves to be feeling this kind of anxiety. She led him on numerous times, messed around with his heart, and ultimately broke it. It's only fair that she suffers a little bit. But it would be a lot easier to know whether he was going to give her a chance or not. 

She still wants to end things with Ezra. But if she doesn't have Jason, she's not sure how to do it, and if she should even do it. She doesn't want to lose  _both_ of them. She feels guilty for thinking that way. It sounds indecisive. It sounds like she wasn't even sure about her decision with Jason, but she is. She has feelings for the both of them, but she really wants to try things out with Jason.

She parks in the driveway of the home she shares with Ezra, sighing to herself loudly. She's ready to just get in there and...  _crash_.

She really wants to sleep this one off. She has to go back to work soon, and it's going to be hell if Jason still hasn't made his decision, and she's left there hanging. He told her that he needs some time to think about it. And she knows that he deserves that time, but God... it's killing her. Now she knows how horrible he felt throughout this whole thing.

She walks over to the door and unlocks it, tiredly stepping inside. The lights are all of. She didn't think she was out for  _that_ long that Ezra's already asleep. Nonetheless, she searches for the light switch to light the practically pitch-dark room up. And when she turns the lights on and turns around, Ezra is right there below her, down on one knee. The ring box that she had found with Spencer the other day is in his hands, but it's unopened. Aria swallows hard. Her eyes are wide at the scene.

His eyes look tearful as he begins to speak. "Aria Montgomery... I don't know where to begin. We've been through hell and back together, but we're still standing. We still love each other. And I still want to spend the rest of my life with you. That's what I think true love is. Because I have loved you unconditionally since the moment that we first met... and believe me, we've had our problems, but in the grand scheme of things, that's not important. What's important is that I love you so much, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So, will you do me the honor of marrying me?"

She knows he means every word that he's just said, and that hurts her. He loves her so much. He really, really does, whether they constantly fight or not. He's clearly willing to fight for her and make it work, and it's painful, considering how much she's fucked up recently.

He's made mistakes that have pushed her away, but that doesn't justify what she's done to him... what she's still hiding from him now. She feels like a horrible person, and maybe she is, despite all her friends assuring her otherwise. It's true. She's a cheater, and she cheated on a good man that loves her a lot. In fact, she cheated on a good man that wants to spend the rest of his life with her and just proposed to her.

"Aria?"

Ezra furrows his eyebrows. He seems confused now. All of him is hoping that she's just in too much shock that he popped the question, but part of him is worried that maybe she just doesn't want to marry him... Oh God, he feels like he fucked up. He thought that they both wanted this. He thought that they were on the same page about spending the rest of their lives together.

Aria has known that he was going to propose for quite a while now, but this still shocked her. The timing couldn't have been worse, could it have? She had  _just_ come home from telling Jason how she feels about him. It's her fault for deciding this too late. Now, if she's going to end things with him, she has to do it by turning down his proposal and telling him what a bad person she is.

She can't bring herself to tell him about everything that's happened with Jason. It'd break him. She knows how much he hates people who cheat on their partners. It would be easier for him to not know about it.

"I'm sorry, Ezra," her voice cracks. "I can't... I just—I can't do this right now, okay?"

Ezra opens his mouth to speak, but a tearful Aria runs back out the door and into her car. Once she's inside of her car, she breathes heavily and rapidly, letting the tears stream down her cheeks uncontrollably. She doesn't fight it anymore. She just really needs to fucking cry right now... cry about what a fucking mess she's let this become. 

 She doesn't get much time to herself, though. Ezra's not the type of guy to let her run off crying and not be concerned. Unsurprisingly, he appears outside just a few moments afterwards. He proceeds towards Aria's car, but Aria doesn't want to talk to him about this. She doesn't want to deal with the monster that she's created. So, before he can reach her car, she twists the key into the car and drives away from him quickly. For a little bit, she doesn't know where she's driving off to, but eventually, she decides that she'll go to Spencer's house. She knows that she can count on Spencer to be there for her.

After a few minutes, she parks near Spencer's house and walks towards the door. She waits nervously after ringing the doorbell. Toby answers the door. He furrows his eyebrows.

"Hey, Aria..." he says, seeming decently concerned. "It's pretty late, you know. Are you okay?"

"I know," she sniffles. "But I just fucked up really badly, and I can't go home to Ezra right now, so..."

"You need a place to crash?" he concludes, but looks understanding.

She nods her head weakly. He moves away from the door, giving her space to walk inside.

"Spencer is asleep, and I don't want to wake her up. She's got to be up pretty early for a client meeting tomorrow, so... You're stuck with me," he chuckles awkwardly, scratching his head. "You can take the guest bedroom upstairs. I'll get you blankets."

She nods her head again.

"Do you need anything else?" he asks, concerned. "I can get you something to drink, if you want. Hot chocolate, coffee?"

"No, but thank you," she says. 

"Of course," he smiles.

To her surprise, Toby walks closer to her and gives her a comforting hug that lasts just a few seconds. She follows him upstairs to the guest bedroom, where she stays for the night.

 As she's settling down in the guest room, she finally dares to look at her phone. And just as she thought, Ezra's already left several voicemails, text messages, and calls expressing his concern, which only make her feel even worse about everything that she's done to hurt him. She sniffles as she turns her phone off and puts it on the nightstand, then pulls the blanket over her body. She can't bring herself to close her eyes for a long time, since the tears just keep streaming from her eyes. At some point, she finally convinces herself to stop thinking about it... at least for the night, so that she can get some sleep.

* * *

The next morning, Aria slowly opens her eyes to the sound of the guest room door creaking. She's still insanely tired and groggy, but forces herself to lift her head up so that she can see who's there. It's Spencer, who offers her a pitiful smile before taking a few steps towards the bed. She's already dressed in her work clothes, which probably means that they don't have much time to talk.

"Hey there, Ar... Toby told me what happened last night. How are you doing?" she asks, tilting her head to the side.

She sits on the bed across from Aria, still looking awfully pitiful and concerned. She continues to look at Aria like she's broken and fragile, which she definitely is right now.

"Not very well, to be honest," she answers, sighing and running a hand through her hair. "Spence... how do you fix things when you've screwed up this badly?"

Spencer presses her lips together. She reaches across the bed and squeezes Aria's arm.

"What happened last night... before you got here?" Spencer asks.

"I told Jason how I feel about him. I picked him. I told him that I want a second chance," Aria explains, swallowing hard.

Spencer raises her eyebrows, "And? What did he say, Ar?"

"He said he has to think about it... and I don't blame him, Spence. That's not why I'm like this. I was okay with waiting. I put him through hell, and I was fine with having him make me feel the same way, at least for a little while," Aria explains.

"Then what is it?" Spencer asks.

"I went back to my place, and Ezra... he, um, he proposed to me," she explains nervously. 

Spencer lets out a deep breath.

"Oh boy..." she breathes. "Well, you knew it was coming at some point. You found the ring a while ago. And you guys were beginning to repair things in your relationship, weren't you?"

Aria nods her head.

"I know. I should've seen it coming. We were on really good terms again, and he still has no idea what I've done behind his back," Aria sighs. "I just... I want this to become uncomplicated. I want to get myself out of this situation."

"Ar, I'm not gonna lie. This situation is a mess," Spencer admits. "But I also believe that you're strong enough to deal with this maturely. You can't run away from them forever. Maybe you'll end up with Ezra, maybe you'll end up with Jason, maybe you'll end up with neither of them."

"It's really seeming like the last option now. Even if I wanted to work things out with Ezra, he'd never look at me the same if I told him the truth about Jason," Aria says.

"But I thought you made your mind up about Jason. Even if he says no to you, you want to end things with Ezra, right?" Spencer asks.

Aria shrugs her shoulders.

"I do want to be with Jason. He has a girlfriend, and I don't even know if he'll ever be willing to forgive me. And with Ezra? I want to tell him the truth about everything, but I want to end things with him without hurting him. But that's just impossible now," Aria says.

"You're gonna have to hurt him in this process. And I know, it sucks... but I'm here for you, you know that, right?" Spencer smiles.

"Well, that's why I came here in the first place. You're one of the only people I know is always gonna be there for me," Aria smiles back.

"I love you," Spencer says.

"I love you, too, Spence," Aria says.

The brunette leans across the bed and gives her friend a tender, warm hug. When she pulls back, she tilts her head to the side.

"I'd love to stay here with you and talk all day, but I've actually got a client meeting to go to right now. I don't know if Toby told you that or not, but... yeah, I've gotta go," she sighs.

"No, I totally get it. Some people actually have priorities, unlike me, who's been skipping work to deal with my love life. I'm the worst," Aria groans.

Spencer chuckles quietly.

"I know that you'll get back on your feet eventually. But, you really might want to call your workplace and figure that out. The last thing you want is to lose your job, too," Spencer warns.

"I know, I know. I'll get on it as soon as possible," Aria says.

"Good girl. You can stay here for as long as you'd like. If you're still around when I get back from work, we can talk some more, but that might be on the later end," Spencer tells her.

* * *

Jason sits on the couch, absentmindedly staring at the floor. He can't stop thinking about what happened with Aria. It's a fucking rollercoaster with her, yet he still can't seem to just cut her out of his life already. He shakes it off, trying to bring himself back to reality when Kat enters her living room with a bright smile on her face and two cups of coffee in her hands. She sets the coffee down on the table, then sits down next to Jason. She places her hand on the back of his neck.

"Hey... everything okay, baby?" she asks with concern in her voice, raising her eyebrows. "You've been a little weird this morning."

He forces a smile onto his face.

"Nah, I'm fine," he responds, turning to face her, still smiling. "In fact, I'm  _better_ than fine. I'm damn great." 

He leans in, kissing her weakly. She massages the back of his neck gently with her fingers. She starts pulling back from him, but he yanks her in again, kissing her harder this time. He tries slipping his tongue into her mouth, but she denies it, and fully disconnects their lips.

"Drink your coffee before it gets cold!" she tells him, laughing as she looks at his disappointed face.

"I don't need any coffee to stay warm in this cold weather... we can keep ourselves heated, can't we?" he smirks, and starts to lean again.

Kat feels defeated as she accepts his hot kisses. He slides his hands down her back, gripping onto her ass roughly. He starts dominating her on the couch, pushing her head back against its arm. As he continues kissing her, he squeezes her ass harder, causing her to let out a soft moan. But fuck, he wishes that it were Aria moaning underneath him. He fucking wishes that he was squeezing Aria's ass instead. He fucking wishes that Aria was the one making him coffee in the morning. Suddenly, he feels repulsed that he's making out with Kat. He shivers, pulling back from her and sitting up on the couch.

"What? Did you suddenly get  _too_ much warmth?" Kat jokes, scratching her head, still laying against the arm of the couch. She furrows her eyebrows when she sees Jason sitting there in plain silence. "Jas... what is it?"

"Nothing," he shakes his head, faking another smile. "I suddenly realized that wasting the coffee is a bad idea. You spent time making it for me, and I appreciate that, Kat."

Kat laughs quietly, shaking her head.

" _Just_ when I got into the mood... it's a shame."

Jason swallows hard as he picks up his cup of coffee from the table and brings it to his lips.

* * *

Aria flips through channels on the TV upstairs when the doorbell rings. She suddenly becomes curious, so she lowers the volume of her show and tries to listen in. Spencer's already out to work, so Toby answers the door downstairs.

 _"E-Ezra! Hey! What's up, man?"_ Toby sounds startled.

 _"Hey..."_ Ezra mutters. Aria feels a pit in her stomach at how distraught and sad he sounds. She never meant to make him feel this way.  _"Um, I was kinda wondering if you've seen Aria. Or maybe... if Spencer has seen her. I'm worried about her, and we really need to talk. She bolted on me last night, and she didn't come home. I'm just... really lost."_

 _"Uh..."_ Toby mumbles. Aria wonders if he's going to tell Ezra that she's there. 

Ezra sighs.  _"I figured she wouldn't want you guys to tell me that she's here, but I kinda figured that she'd be here so she could be with Spencer. I get that you're trying to respect her, but this is really important, Toby. I wouldn't come here like this if it wasn't important."_

There's a long pause. Aria decides that she'll relieve Toby of his stress. She cracks the door open before Toby can speak. Both of their eyes fly straight to her. Ezra seems beyond startled, although he seemed to already know that she's here.

"Hi," she mumbles out, just audibly enough for them to hear it.

"Hi," Ezra greets back, swallowing hard.

He walks inside, right past Toby.

"Um... I've gotta go to work now," Toby announces. "Will you two be okay here? I mean, I figure you'd rather be alone to discuss this, anyway."

"Yeah, we'll be fine," Ezra nods his head. He pats Toby's shoulder, allowing the other man to offer them an apologetic smile before disappearing out the door. Ezra shuts the door and continues walking towards the staircase.

He doesn't want to endlessly beat around the bush with her, but he's afraid that he'll make her run away from him again if he says something too direct. He can't help but _want_ to be direct, though... All he really wants is an answer to why she's acting this way. He can understand if this is about not being ready to get married or something. It would hurt that she doesn't, but he believes they can be fixed if that's the problem.

"I'm... uh, I'm glad that you're safe," he gulps, continuing to take slow steps.

She starts walking down the stairs so that she can come near him.

"Look, Ezra..." she begins, tears starting to form in her eyes. Her vision grows blurry from the tears. "I know you want answers."

"That's all I've been thinking about," he says calmly, yet she can sense his anxiety.

"The problem is... that I'm not sure if I can give you those answers," she sniffles.

"Why not, Aria?" he asks pleadingly. He looks at her with so much concern in his icy blue eyes. "I just... I just wanna know how I can fix this... I wanna know what the problem is. I need to know where we stand, and how we're going to move forward from this. You can tell me what's going on... you know you can. We've been through hell and back together, and we've always stayed strong and resolved our issues. I wanna listen to what you have to say. We can talk it out, and we can calmly figure out how to move forward. All that matters is that I love you, Ar. If you don't want to get married, that's something we can discuss." 

Aria's breaths are shaky. She stares at him for a long time, wordlessly. She  _wants_ to say something, but she can't. Because she knows that if she opens her mouth and spills the truth, it's really over between them. It has to be. There's no way that he would ever forgive her for everything she has done. And she had made herself okay with that before because she knows she wants something with Jason, but it's scary to have the end of her long, long relationship with Ezra right in front of her eyes. And she can see it now: this is the end of that. It's possible that she won't even see Ezra anymore. At least, she doubts he'll want to be anywhere near her once he knows the truth.

That all feels so...  _final_ to her. She hates that it feels so final, that she has no undo button in her life where she can see how one thing plays out and just press 'undo' if it isn't what she wants. She really, really needs that undo button because she's fucked up so many times recently that she would kill for it.

"We  _can't_ ," her voice cracks. "We just... we  _can't_ fix this, we can't do that, Ezra." 

"Why are you making that decision for us?" he raises his eyebrows. "You don't even know how I'm going to react to whatever this is. You're making this huge decision for us when I don't even know what the problem is! I want to  _know_ , Aria. I want to know why you can't marry me. Is that so much to ask for?"

Aria stays silent again. She just can't tell him.

"Aria, please," he tilts his head to the side. "I have loved you for so long, and I still love you now. Nothing is going to change that, okay? You are the love of my life... I'm sure of it. I'm so, so sure of it. When we started this new year, we told each other that we were going to do things right this time around, and I meant it when I made all of those promises. I promised myself that we are going to be healthy and work things out. And that means that we are going to address our problems together and figure things out. That means that we are going to do whatever it takes to get through whatever life throws at us. I'm willing to compromise and work through anything with you because I  _love you_ , Aria Montgomery. And this type of love doesn't come around a whole lot—it's rare. So, I'm not giving you up. Not now, not yet. Not until I'm certain that there's nothing we can do to salvage our relationship... and I don't believe that. With you, I believe there's  _always_ a way to salvage our relationship... and that's because I love you, and you love me, so there's a way to fix this, no matter what it is. So... talk to me. Talk to me, and we can fix this together."

 Oh God, his whole monologue... his whole confession, it hurts her deeply because she knows how much she's going to hurt him when she tells him the truth. She can see it in his eyes and hear it in his words that he loves her more than anything, but she doesn't  _deserve_ this type of love from him after how much she's done behind his back. She knows he deserves something—someone—much better than she is. He deserves so much better than to be treated like this, even if he's made his own mistakes in their relationship. There's no way that he has ever fucked up as colossally as she has in this relationship.

"Ezra, stop," she shakes her head, tears in her eyes. She looks directly at him, trying not to shy away from eye contact, because she knows she needs to be direct and honest about this. It's about time that she's honest with him. "Don't say any of that, please."

"Why not?" he raises his eyebrows. "I mean every word that I'm saying, and I love you s—"

"I cheated on you," she blurts. "More than once."

Ezra's mouth opens, just a little, quivering. His eyes go wide. She can tell that he doesn't know how to react to this news—it certainly isn't what he was expecting, although, quite frankly, she doesn't know  _what_ he was expecting the big secret that is preventing her from marrying him was. 

She gives him a weak smile. "I told you we couldn't fix this, didn't I?"


End file.
